Not You
by RawMateriel
Summary: Two rebellious teens start to wonder if love is more trouble then it's worth and the differences between good love and bad love are brought into question when the two 'problem children' of the Pure Blood generation in Hogwarts continue in the fight for somewhere to truly belong. Here's hoping Sabione doesn't murder the Black heir first. A collaboration fic with blurred motion.
1. Prologue

Sabione flicked her jet black hair over her shoulder before pressing her ear to the decorative and luxurious wallpaper of her house in London. She could hear the voices of her parents seep through the wall and held her breath to listen. The voices remained muffled and she strained her ear further to figure out what her Mother was yelling about. After remaining like this for several heart beats she pushed away from the wall and huffed lightly. She often thought that her parents cast a spell when they wanted to argue that would allow them to be heard but never understood. Sabione folded her arms and flicked her hair again before turning to leave the tastefully decorated dining room. She went floated through the house with the practised ease of a child who knew that they were there to be seen and not heard. She approached the stairway leading to the safety of her bedroom but as she rounded the corner she was met with the unwelcome site of her towering older brother, Louis.

"Oh sweet baby sister, is it not clear to you how improper snooping and eavesdropping are for a young woman of your status?" She said nothing and Louis raised an eyebrow; "Sabione?" Louis dictated slimily and Sabione grimaced as if the voice had covered her in a vial and stinking mucous. Louis never failed to talk down to her, even outside of her lessons he was loathsome.

"You know," Sabione began tempestuously, "every time I see someone doing what you believe to be "proper" I want to get sick." She didn't think she could have stopped herself saying it even if she had tried. She had reached max capacity and had voiced her thoughts, it was a natural human response beyond her control. Still, she felt awash with regret and terror as Louis's eyes narrowed.

"Louis, I…" Sabione began to attempt to defuse the situation but the phrase was like the flip of a switch and there was no turning back. Somewhere in a distant part of the house her Mothers voice had reached fever pitch as Louis gave Sabione a look that made her blood run cold and her words stick in her throat.

She never did apologize that night, and she never would.


	2. Minister of Magic

A small smile flickered over my face. As I gazed into the distance from the astronomy tower, the unbearable memories of what had seemed like just yesterday flashed through my head.

_"You know," I began stormily, "every time I see someone doing what you believe to be "proper" I want to get sick." I finished._

_My eyes widened as I had realized what I had just said. What I had blurted out uncontrollably without any thought. What this meant. A wave of regret and terror washed over me, as my brother's eyes narrowed._

_"Louis, I…" I attempted to undo effect of the foolish words I had just spoken. The look on his face clearly said my attempt to try and take back what I said was failing miserably. Further away, Mother's cold voice rang through the house. He gave me a look that made fluent words freeze on my tongue, a look that made my blood run cold. It was clear that I wasn't welcome in this household, and if I stayed a heavy consequence would be on my shoulders._

_I chose to walk away - I decided to leave. With each foot slightly shaking, I walked towards the arched door with the crest of the Leroys. With one last glance at the manor, I opened the door and with a heavy heart, left, with none of my possessions left in my bedroom touched in the slightest._

"Miss Leroy, five minutes until it is past your curfew. I suggest you return to the Gryffindor tower?" A stern voice spoke.

"Yes, Professor McGonagall." I replied softly.

With a short, dismissive nod of approval, she disappeared around a corner.

As I walked back to the Gryffindor tower, that day was still fresh in my mind. How long had it been? Weeks, days, months? I would never forget what I did. I raised a hand to my face and it felt hot, as if it was red and blotchy, if I was about to cry. My eyes felt sore too. I quickened my pace considerably, as if I didn't make it back in time, detention would be given.

"Is someone crying?" A low voice taunted, before almost laughing jokingly.

So my face obviously was red, blotchy and nasty looking. And my eyes were probably rimmed with red as well. Ugh. Black and Potter were smirking at me like "omigosh you know that I'm so much better than you" which really was getting to me.

"You will be," I retorted furiously, crossing my arms over my chest, hoping that would make them see I was angry, I wanted them to shut their fat gobs and dissuade them in their mission to keep on talking to me.

"Is that so?" Black questioned mockingly, his eyebrows raised.

"You haven't been through what I have." I said in what I hoped to be in somewhat of an angry manner.

"Leave her alone, guys," Remus sighed and looked at them in a "honestly, you know better then that" way.

"You know what, James, Sirius," I said, faking a sweet tone and pretending to be a little bit chummier with them, "Lily," I could see Potter tense up as well as his expression sour, "as in Lily Evans will be hearing about this. And you won't be getting away with anything, ever."

"You wouldn't dare, Leroy." His eyes were as round and pleading as moon-sized saucers with a cute pattern on it.

It was my turn to smirk that "omigosh you know that I'm so much better than you" smirk. "Says who?" I asked.

"Says me," Potter said as if he was the Minister of Magic.

"Says you my arse," I rolled my eyes. Could Potter's ego get any more inflated? Better not ask him. "Goodnight Remus." I added, giving him a smile.

And with that I walked up the staircase to the girl dorms. Day over, thank goodness for that.


	3. More Pure

I brought my nose right to the edge of the table in an attempt to level my view. The Galleon in question was just two inches out of the points range so all I had to do was angle my flicking sickle just right and… I felt a cloying force at the back of my head as James palm made contact and I slipped forward, completely ruining my carefully formed… formation of… important. Well the coins were all in the wrong place and it was all James fault! Not to mention the damage to my nose, I straightened as I rubbed it and gave James a shove as I plonked back on the chair beside Remus. The book he had been holding slipped from his grip and hit the deck, is he ever not reading?

"I hate this game, I am never playing again! it's a hazard to my nasal health Messr. Prongs. " I announced in a nasally voice as I gingerly massaged my schnoz (hehe, schnoz).

"You say that every time you start to lose." James complained as he collapsed in front between the game table and the common room fire. That's right! Cook Jamesie! I patted my nose happily, you will be avenged my gentle schnoz.

"I think the trend is more inclined to change when you start to lose patients with Messr. Most-important-and-accurate-shot-ever-made-is-every-shot-I-take over here and cheat." Remus slipped into the conversation as he bent to pick up his book.

"Hey!" Both me and James cried as Peter started to snicker and James sat up from his place spread across the floor.

"How could you Moony?" I put on a puppy face and began to sniffle. "Hold me Peter!" I cried out as James started laughing from his seat on the floor… if he didn't turn soon her definitely wasn't going to cook evenly. I thought from place wrapped around Wormtail who was patting my back lightly and giving Remus a reproachful look.

From the other side of the common room I heard the signature bang of the fat lady being closed by a certain feisty someone. I sprang from my seat and James flanked me as I approached the entrance and heard sniffling. James and I shared a look of horror, there is nothing worse in Merlin's long and beardy bag of tricks then a girl who is crying… I floundered for a moment, say something cool, I decided, everyone loves boys who act cool, right? Wrong…

A harried red rimmed pair of violet eyes came in to view and I went a little goofy,

"Is someone crying?" I teased in an attempt to lighten the mood. Her eyes narrowed as her fine hair bristled slightly, I frowned, women.

"You will be." Why did her voice have to be so husky and frenchy? Surely by now my brain would get that this one is a lost cause, great tits aren't everything, Sabione "eat you while you rest" Leroy was proof of that.

"Is that so?" I barbed her slightly, big mistake, seriously though if she didn't want to be taunted she shouldn't have looked so good when she was angry. This chick was obviously touched in the head or she would get atleast that much, her eyes glazed with more unshed tears as she crumpled slightly.

"You haven't been through what I have." She cried, why do girls always have to be so misunderstood, and then they call us insensitive! Sabione never teases me when I'm crying, does she think that being ignored is nice? I crossed my arms as she looked around as if searching for a weapon and James let out an amused huff at my ear.

"Leave her alone, guys." good olde knight in shining armour Lupin piped up, I swear, of all the chicks to defend. Leroy's features morphed slightly into the look of a cat with cream and I felt further distressed, not good. Maybe there is something worse then when bird cries. Like when a cat eats the bird and gets indigestion and throws a fit that kills everyone…

"You know what, James, Sirius," she knew how to say a blokes name, I'll give her that. "Lily," Oh no, not Lily, I felt James tense beside me. "as in Lily Evans will be hearing about this, and you won't getting away with anything, ever." Well, I took in a breath, Leroy obviously has no concept of mercy, we don't get away with anything as it is. Heck we take the fall for everything, it just saves staff time to come straight to me or James when something is amiss.

"You wouldn't dare, Leroy" James was clearly in a state of reclusive panic, I could almost hear his heart beat from here, yup, there it was "Li-ly Li-ly Li-ly" pathetic really, a good body for debauchery but an over powering obsession over some red head. Poor lad.

"Says who?" A sadistic sort of smile that I didn't want to see ever again took up residence on Sabiones sinful mouth, that was so unfair! I was definitely going to master that when we went upstairs!

"Say me." I tried to look like I wasn't going to burst out laughing at James super seriousness. Lily, just say the name, its like Remus and chocolate or Peter and … well anything. I had no vice mind, no weakness. No fear.

"Says you my arse." Sabione spat, and this time I did laugh. What a dame!

"Goodnight Remus." She gave him a tender look and I scowled after her as she hopped up the stairs. Jeez, love men or hate men, she needed to pick one because I cant handle her making bedroom eyes at Lupin while every withering gaze in my direction brings thoughts of imminent castration. Shuddering slightly I decided going upstairs might not be such a bad idea… there are beds up there and Remus is probably knackered.

"I think I have some chocolate in my coat," I blurted nonchalantly. I swear, Moonys ear actually perked up a little.

"Oh, really?" He seemed to be still absorbed in his book but he was well faking.

"Yeah, upstairs, still full from dinner though. I think I might just through it out…" I looked towards the stair well and turned back towards Remus on the coach. Nope, he was long gone.

"Time for bed Prongsie baby." I flourished in a totally manly way which was followed by some testosterone fuelled swoony motions before I fell back on to Wormtails lap. I saw James head toward the stairwell and wrapped my arms around Peters cushiony belly.

"Carry me close Wormy!" Peter giggled before standing up and letting me tumble to the floor and scrambling after James.

"Leave some chocolate!" I heard him bellow up the stairs as I held out my arms after him forlornly.

"He left my James," I released a sob before falling flat on my back "He left me."

"I know it hurts now, Padfoot, but in time you'll come to accept it!" James voice seemed to be getting farther away and as I sat up I realised it was because it was. Alone in the common room I pouted on the floor for a moment before following the others up to bed. Those boys could be so mean, I huffed.

"Stop being such a diva Sirius!" James laughed as I entered in to the room with a frown and tore off my shirt before falling onto my bed in my trousers while stare at the canopy above my bed as if it was a source of great evil I heard more laughter coming from the bathroom.

"Is Padfoot staring at his curtains like they said nice things about his Mother again?" Moonys voice echoed out.

"My Mother is a Saint!" I cried.

"Now, now Sirius, no need for that sort of talk." James chastised from the end of his bed where he sat, polishing his glasses on his shirt.

I curled up in bed and stretched before shimmying out of my trousers and throwing my socks at Peters head.

"You know I think your right guys, life isn't so bad after all, good night!" I drew the curtains around me head before I heard the bathroom door slam.

"You know he has his chocolate in there with him Remus." James stated matter of factly like the big Lily loving traitor he was.

When Remus eventually retrieved his well earned bar of chocolate we were all laughing so hard it didn't seem like there would be enough air in the room to sustain us. There were no survivors.

The next morning I woke up feeling a bit furry tongued and sore around the nose but generally pleased… until I realised my skin was died green. I ran into the bathroom and checked myself in the mirror feeling suddenly very alert and was followed by three other green and gawking marauders.

"Finite Incantatum!" James cried, pointing his wand at my back.

His spell only managed to worsen the situation further by imbibing a pair of silver racing striped running down my torso and a finely penned "Slytherin forever" scrawled across my green face in a flashing and amassable silver.

"JAMES!" I cried forlornly, "Would you save your fancy wand waving for Evans, Christ." I stared at our gawpy reflections a moment longer.

"Fix it Remus!" I demanded. He rolled his eyes and shrugged before returning to the dorm and digging for his robes.

"Nooooo!" I cried, my beautiful face, where will I put Marlenes mouth now? Everything is green! I am going to find whoever did this and I am going to do a number on them.

"Take a note Messr.s" I cried out from my place in front of the mirror, "I swear a marauders revenge."

"Didn't we agree not to throw that term around?" Remus chastised.

"I am deadly Sirius." I shrieked masculinely as the lettering on my face morphed into "More pure!"

"This will not stand." Then it all made perfect sense as her words echoed in my head…

"you won't be getting away with anything, ever." Damnitall Leroy!

Didn't I always say that bird was a lost cause?


	4. Beauty Queen

Sirius Black this, Sirius Black that. Sirius Black my arse.

Whatever.

It was early morning, and that incident with Black, Potter and Remus was still playing in my head. I had spilled every little detail to Lily last night and she said she'd get them back for me.

I got dressed into usual attire for clothes, you know skirt, blouse, tie and sweater, before walking down the staircase that lead from the dorm to the common room, only to see Black, Potter, Pettigrew and Remus yapping like poodles.

Then I realized Black and Potter were coloured in a gloriously garish green and a equally as bad silver. And smack bang in the exact center of Black's forehead were words in cursive script,

"More pure, Black?" I asked incredulously, my eyebrows raised, honestly, even though I wanted to laugh and laugh and laugh like a pig, it really wasn't my job to go around giving thumbs up for advertising was needed to be improved on Black in Slytherin eyes. "Seriously?" I couldn't help a little snort, "Since when did you go around promoting the wellbeing of Slytherins?"

"Leroy! What did you do to my beautiful face?" Black shrieked, such a beauty queen, that boy.

"It wasn't me, honest to Merlin!" I quickly slapped my hand on my heart.

"Really!" Potter snorted disbelievingly.

"It wasn't me, I swear." I drew a cross over my chest with my finger. "By the way, I did tell your precious Lily about last night...so it could've been..." I trailed off.

"Spot on, Sabione. It was me."

Lily laughed like the tinkling of a music box playing a tune.

"It was you, Evans?" Potter asked, impressed.

"Didn't you hear Lily the first time?" I asked him, shaking my head.

Black crossed his arms over his chest as if he refused to believe this scenario.

"I doubt it." He said firmly. Standing on "I blame Sabione for everything" grounds are we, now?

I smirked that smirk again.

"Eh, it was rather impressive but it really wasn't me. I don't do flashy." I bit my lip.

"Wait….so it wasn't Leroy?" Potter asked slowly, realization dawning over his face, before looking at me.

"No shit, Sherlock." I agreed.

"Wait, so how do we get rid of the green?" Black asked, scratching his green ear with his silver hand.

"It's a time release spell. For every prank or insult, one day of green and silver." Lily explained, smiled angelically, bejeebus, this girl could pull something off like this...I underestimated her pranking skills.

"Fucking hell, woman, now Marlene and I can't have rendezvous using our lips!" TMI.

"Good for you, have a nice day, Black. And Potter, since you didn't annoy as much as Black, last night, I'll help you look better." I winked at him and mouthed "for lily" discreetly and he caught it, before beaming a rainbow at me.

I cast a quick illusion charm on his face, and a glamour charm over the rest of him. He looked normal.

"You owe me, Potter." I said, poking him in the stomach with my pointer finger.

He smiled genuinely at me.

"I will."

As I headed towards the portrait hole of the common room I heard a few muffled whispers.

"….She still did it. Let's do revenge."

"She helped me. I'm out."

"She didn't do anything to us. We're out too."

"I'll do it myself."

"Good luck, Padfoot."

"You'll need it."

I shook my head and sighed. Hopefully today they would have pancakes today…..


	5. Sirius writes a List

I decided that breakfast was secondary to the cause of revenge as I watched Sabione take her shapely bum and march off, leaving me with James who was now floating in between the obtuse misery of Evans betrayal and sheer joy of her having entered our dorm,

"I cannot believe Lily would do something like this," James claimed forlornly as he wafted his peach coloured skin around like the great dirty show off he was, "this is so unlike her!"

I rolled my eyes as I place my Slytherin green hand on my beautiful Gryffindor clad hip, I had drawn a lion on my side to make myself feel better before coming downstairs.

"The reason you "cannot believe Lily would do something like this," is because she wouldn't Potter! She was obviously just covering for Sabione cause the French tart cried on her! She still did it. Lets do revenge." I said all this in an elated, finally she gets her just desserts which she would look amazing eating with that ruby mouth… off topic.

James however, looked conflicted.

"But she helped me. I'm out." My jaw dropped as I whipped round to look at the shruggy look James was giving me… He obviously didn't want to let go of his dreams about Evans watching over him while he slept or some arse faced logic like that. I turned to Remus expectantly, surely Remus would see through the façade, he new what Sabione was like; I scowled, more like thought she was a delicate flower.

"She didn't do anything to us. We're out too." Since when did Peter speak… at all? Never mind for Remus; but he seemed to agree.

"I'll do it myself." I threatened, hoping the very thought of me starting a war with Leroy would cause Remus to change his mind and finally turn away from the untailored diamond girl.

"Goodluck, Padfoot." Remus consented to Peters statement as I tried to morph my face into that of a puppy which not even the devil himself could deny. Damn friends, stinky traitorous only friends…

"You'll need it." James put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a squeeze.

"No need to salt my wounds Potter." I crossed my arms and decided that the need for revenge remained.

"I need to go plan a plan of some sort," I looked at them each with my green eyes in my green face and choked out weepily "all alone!"

My fellow marauders remained unmoved however and I heaved a deep sigh.

"Fine, go and have fun Messr.s, I'm off to complete my vow of a maunders revenge!" I wiggled my emerald eyebrow at them before turning and heading back to the dorm.

"Hey Moonie, your going all peachy again!" I heard Wormtail squeak out.

"So I am," said Remus cheerily and I scowled deeper.

"Now its just you and Sirius and-" James voice was blocked out as I slammed the dorm room door as hard as I could for dramatic effect. I felt a bit better already.

I sat down on my underused desk and looked began to clear away all the old chocolate frog wrapper before giving up and moving to Remus's beautiful prefect-ly desk. I pulled a spare piece of parchment from the ground and smoothed out the wrinkles with the flat of my hand.

Perfect, I took out a quill and wrote;

"Sirius Blacks incredibly well planned out and organized list of ways get revenge on Sabione "Frenchie" Leroy"

I admired the sheet for a moment before adding;

"from the desk of Remus Lupin where Sirius Black is sitting"

Number 1... Uuh, what does Sabione not like? Uuum

I began to feel tired but I wanted to have a few ideas before class started.

"Number 1: convince her that she is allergic to something and then cover everything she wons with it."

Yeah! Except that would take to long…

"Number 2: do something and use her as a scape goat"

This list is really weak, even for me on my own. How hard can it be to come up with something someone hates?!

Sabione hates everything anyway! Except Remus and stuff like him, what is the opposite of Remus and stuff?

I twiddled my green thumbs and felt like I was missing something very obvious before realising I had tipped my chair back to far and tumbling on to the usually neat area of ground surrounding Remus's desk. Luckily I had put some chocolate frog wrappers here to break my fall, I was so good like that.

I straightened my chair and sat down again before thinking really hard about good defences against pimples, I mean not that I had any but is it really worth risking?

I looked down at my green hand and watched it doodle my names a few times on the edge of the sheet. Like, what could I possibly be missing?! I read over the sheet again:

Sirius Blacks incredibly well planned out and organized list of ways get revenge on Sabione "Frenchie" Leroy, from the desk of Remus Lupin where Sirius Black is sitting:

Number 1: convince her that she is allergic to something and then cover everything she loves with it

Number 2: do something and use her as a scape goat

Number 3:

**Sirius Black**

_Sirius Black _

_**Sirius Black**_

…

_**Ooooooooh…**_


	6. Frenchie Leroy

After I had gone for breakfast, I decided potions was second nature and I didn't have to go. On the way back to my dorm, I picked up a piece of paper that was on the floor for some reason. I turned it over for a name so I could give it back to them.

I was wrong. I wouldn't be returning it to the owner. I would be shoving it up his face.

It belonged to Black. I gave a quick glance at the messily scrawled title.

Sirius Black's incredibly well planned out and organized list of ways to get revenge on Sabione "Frenchie" Leroy.

Revenge on me? Oh, what a pleasant surprise. Really, revenge on me? What did I do? Who cares what I did? Why not give him hell?

I stormed up the staircase to his dorm. Remus looked at me.

"Sabione? Is there a problem?" he asked, his face creasing with worry. I was never one to worry about. But people seemed to oppose to that.

"Where is Black?" I asked, oddly calm.

"Is someone looking for me?" the the devil himself asked.

I walked in and punched Black's nose. A satisfying cracking noise resulted.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?" he yelled at me. That wasn't really one of the most exciting comebacks. In fact, every victim that my fist ended up in usually said that. It was one of the most predictable phrases ever.

Black and I never got on well. One way or another, it only ended in blood. I held up the list and shoved it in his face.

"MY NAME IS NOT FRENCHY! YOU INSOLENT ASSHOLE!"

"Guys, guys, calm down."

Remus, the knight to save the damsel in distress. The damsel in a lot of distress, actually.

"What's the problem?"

"She stole my list!" he said at the same time as I said,

"He was planning to ruin me!"

He gave me a protective look, and gave Black a you-come-near-her-and-I'll-kill-you look.

"Lay off, Sirius." He said warningly.

"Obtenir pissé, Noire. Aller à l'enfer et reculer. Aller à l'enfer et séjour là." I muttered, loud enough for them both to hear. Then I remembered, Remus could understand a bit of French. Enough to realize what I had said.

He chuckled.

"What did she say?" Black asked Remus.

"Trust me, you do not want to know."

He wouldn't.

"Well, see ya, around!" I said, walked out the door. I winked at Remus flirtatiously, first, who grinned back.

I could sense the jealously radiating off Black. It was obvious…..that came to an awful, sinful, unbelievably deadly conclusion. Which of course, I shook off.

I made a silent promise to myself.

I, Sabione Leroy swear I will not fall in love with Sirius Black, unless he admits he's in love with me first. Which is bound to NOT happen.


	7. Chocolate

She winked, she definitely just winked at Remus. I felt jealous, no one should ever EVER wink at Remus except me, never mind Frenchy, my nose stabbed my face and I decided I might as well get to the hospital wing before Remus found someone to take that "to sexy for Sirius girl winked at me" grin out on.

I made a vague gesture and waltzed off. Peters green skin had turned to normal but for now I was learning to work mine buy pairing it with some nice shoes. I really should have disposed of that list more carefully in stead of giving it to Peeves. Why would I give it to Peeves?

I waltzed into the hospital wing and began flailing around like a big green and red thing that is green and red.

"Madame Pomfreeeeeeey?!" I cried out miserably. Although it sounded more like,

"Badub Pubfreeeeeeguh…wheeze" The Poppy "sexy nurse" Pomfrey came out from behind a gauze curtain and I suddenly felt a bit scruffy to be coming in here all green and bloody even if I was wearing nice shoes.

"Oh, Mr. Black! What have you done to yourself now?" She fussed over me flightily and sat me in a hard chair before whipping her wand around and returning my skin to its original shade of pasty white which I liked to call "Sexy light beige". She then flicked her wand wordlessly as I gazed at my sexy light beige hand and I was suddenly assaulted by a sharp unexpected pain as my nose snapped back to where it had been.

"Holy-" I stopped my explanative, Sirius Black rule number … well one of them, was never to curse in front of a lady. Poppy took some warm, damp cotton and began mopping away the blood from my, thankfully wonderful, face. She seemed heavily focused on the task and I tried to sneak a peek down her apron covered blouse wrapped cleavage. I felt her breath waft over my face and blushed a little as she moved closer. Cool it. Cool it. Cool it. Cool it. But it was to late, by the time she had moved away to inspect her work I was probably in a worse state then Remus after a certain wink, I felt jealous again and decided that maybe it wasn't Remus getting looked at that bothered me. It was Frenchy winking at, well, not me.

Poppy balanced a hand on my thigh as she turned my face from side to side for inspection.

"You seem a bit flushed." She clipped out, I sighed forlornly, why were all the good women mean or married to there work?

I turned to her and smiled my best roguish smile, "I'm sure it's a state you are very familiar with finding young men in Poppy!" she pursed her lips and moved to the wash basin to clean her hands.

"You will be fine Black, now stop being a scoundrel and take that look off your face!"

"Oh Poppy, You wound me." I cried, as I made my way to the door, "Thanks for the fix up and the new coat of paint!"

"Stay out of trouble Mr. Black." She called out as I replaced the slab of wood in its frame.

Likely, I laughed to myself as I tried to not think of ways to get in trouble with the blonde nurse.

Oh, right, revenge plan. What good timing… where would Frenchy be at this time of day I wonder.

I looked at the clock over the hospital wing door, last class had just finished.

Library, to perfect, I made my way there with a minimal amount of trouser adjusting.

"What a dame" I shook my head as I reached the library and barged through the door. Sure enough, there was Leroy sitting next to Remus, pooring over something or other…

Ok, I thought to myself, time to be really hard to hate or whatever.

I stood behind her and cleared my throat before tapping her shoulder gently.

"Sabione?" I asked in a gentle tone, I saw her posture flinch as she turned in her seat sharply to give me a "why are you here/born" look. Remus was also giving me a look that said, "Don't be anything like you".

"What is it now…" Her eyes travelled over my front and I felt like I might get somewhere as I adjusted the angle of my leg slightly. "Why have you turned all pale and you coloured again?"

"Po- Pumfrey did a number on me, listen Sabione, can I have a word?" Her eyes narrowed, I tried not to correct her on the exact way to phrase my skin colour.

"Don't say my name" She turned away and gave me the finger, "or speak to me at all for that matter."

" I just wanted to apologise," I put on an upset voice, "Come on Leroy, don't make me apologise to your back!" Her body didn't seem to relax but she turned around and looked resigned… which by her standards just meant not murderous.

"If I talk to you will you go away?" She hiss whispered.

I nodded vigorously and she rolled her eyes and stood.

"You have one minute! I'll be a while Remus, I need to pick something up after I finish talking to Black."

I frowned a little, the way she said Remus's name was so intimate, she spat my name out like poison. I felt a little hot around the edges when I thought of all the ways Sabione would say my name.

"No problem Violet." Remus laughed breathily at my -why do you get a bazillion names to call her when I only get one?- face , "I have an essay for astronomy." He finished.

"Come on Black." oh she was a pretty sort of agitated, like she looked good. Oh, why did she have to look so good?

"Right," I began, "Listen, Sabione, I just wanted to," I moved closer to her, "I wanted to say how sincerely sorry I am for…" She looked unimpressed and leaned into the large book mahogany book shelf behind her

"For..?" She prompted as I tried to think of something that would make her less likely to try and nash at/ kill me.

"Being born a really in sufferable idiot? And I really hope that I can be forgiven for any offence I have caused you. I mean, Remus always says to be nice to you because you have a tough time of it and, well, I guess you punched some sense into me?" I moved a little closer to her.

She let out a loud shale of laughter before quieting herself. Her happy face and thrown back head were really making me start to think that inflicting myself on her for revenge might not be such a good idea. But nothing would make Leroy more crazy then me kissing her. And she turned me green and punched me in the face!

"You are an idiot Black," she said breathlessly and I bit the inside of my mouth, cool it. Cool it. Cool it. Cool it. "But at least you're pretty…" She trailed off as all remaining traces of humour washed from her face and I attempted to turn my goofy grin into just a nonchalant chuckle.

I moved a little closer and put my hand on the book shelf behind her, her purple tinged blue eyes widened a bit and she pressed herself against the shelf,

"What are you playing at Black? Because if "I apologise" is code for "I want to take you roughly from behind in the library" then you are about to be in a world of pain." I looked down at the space between us and then straight back in to her eyes. God I didn't really mind if this wasn't revenge at all. I was just so horny and she was so soft and hard and hot and fucking French! I didn't stand a fucking chance.

"I just…" I swooped in and pressed my mouth against hers, she immediately bit me but I didn't even care, it just made me hotter and her hotter and it was just so damn hot as I pushed my hand into her hair.

Sabione began to squirm and I moved away to breath as I felt shots of pleasure from her movements shoot up my stomach;

"Damn…" I breathed.

"Damn fucking you Black!" She hissed before tugging me roughly to her mouth again and kissing me.

Me! Her kissing ME! Her mouth was warm and I could just about taste chocolate off her, Remus. I began to kiss her harder and she pressed against me gently. Oh fuck, oh shit. Cool it. Cool it. Cool it.

She moved back and I licked her retreating lip lightly with out thinking as she leaned against the shelf with her eyes squeezed tight shut, chocolate. My thoughts were blurred as I felt my heart hum in my chest and began to flush. I leaned in and her eyes snapped open. I felt a punch hit me solidly in the gut and I fell back a step.

"What? Do you lift weights or some," lady, I reminded myself, "stuff?" I asked, censoring my sentence while standing buckled over in pain from her very un lady like sucker punch.

"Stay the hell away from me Sirius Black!" She cried before spinning on her heel and leaving me sore and alone and horny and quite possibly permanently damaged.

Why the hell would my brain choose her?

Lost cause damnit! For some reason I wasn't getting that satisfied revenge feeling, instead I was feeling more unsatisfied then I had before in my life.

Hell,

"She fucking kissed me!" I said to know one as I liked a splodge of blood from my lip, "and bit me!"

How emasculating I thought as I rearranged myself in my trousers and decided to go back to the dorm and do nothing in particular… well maybe one thing, a few times.

I blushed a little as I reached the library door and shook my head again.

Chocolate…


	8. My Best Friend: The Black Lake

"Damn fucking you Black!" I hissed. Oh. Shit. What had I gotten myself into? Playing with Hogwarts's womanizer.

I tugged him closer and met his lips again. What was he playing at? What was I playing at? I snapped out of my trance and remembered who I was snogging to Hades. Yeah, I was snogging Sirius bloody fucking Black, who I had once thought I told to him to piss off and stay in hell. I broke away and moved back towards the shelf, and shut my eyes tightly. He licked my lip just as I moved back. At least after this, I could kill myself, since I'd now snogged majority the marauders (snogging Remus was an accident and snogging Potter was definitely an accident. That means snogging Black must be an accident too, right?) The apocalypse could rain down at this moment, and I would have appreciated it.

My first reaction, when I realized what happened, was punching Black in a sensitive area. Startled, he slightly moved away from me. I could breathe.

"Do you lift weights or some," he paused for a second and re-worded what shit was about to come out of his mouth, "stuff?"

He looked slightly pained from my little "experiment of what a boys reaction to the fist is."

"Stay the hell away from me Sirius Black!" I cried loudly, which caused the attention of a few third-year girls. I turned on my heel.

And I ran for it.

Holy shit. I just kissed Sirius bloody fucking Black.

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. I ran faster. People just stopped at stared.

The tears ran down. I had never cried so hard in my life. Over a boy. That stupid fucking womanizer. He was playing at me. It was all a game to him. Everything. The asshole should be satisfied with what he got. The sweet taste of revenge was probably what he gave me.

Everything was just a game. I was just another girl to amuse him. Play with him.

"Violet!"

Remus's voice rang out. I didn't stop.

"Sabione!" Lily cried.

I wasn't going to let anyone stand in my way.

"Leroy!" James desperately yelled.

Nothing would ever stand in my way. No one would ever stand in my way.

Gryffindor, where their daring, nerve and chivalry set them apart.

I ran outside the castle, to the lake. And I jumped. That was being brave, right? The salty water hit me. Everything blurred.

And everything went black.

"She's not going to make it." Madam Pomfrey said, peering at me.

"Says who?"

I could feel my lips etch into a smirk. My eyes flickered open. I cocked an eyebrow.

Lily looked like she was going to die of relief. Potter (or should I say James, my friend because why else would he be sitting near my deathbed?) was grinning. Marlene snorted. Remus wasn't surprised and looked at me as if he knew this was going to happen.

I broke the silence.

"What?"


	9. Achilles Heel

After several excursions in the dorm and a nap I decided it must be about dinner time. I moseyed down to the common room and found it empty of my fellow marauders, confused. I went back upstairs to find them on the map, The mass of names in the great hall didn't seem to feature anyone of note, grounds? No. I scanned it and saw a few squirming dots.

The hospital wing? They should be keeping a distance from my Poppy. I thought, before I saw Sabiones little banner. Damn.

I dropped the map and ran. By the time I had passed all the motion blurred paintings and walked through Nick and some other ghost in my haste to reach her, I thought my lungs might explode.

I arrived at the door of the hospital wing and put my hand on the handle purposefully before hesitating. Slowing my movements I cracked the door open and peaked in, there she was, frail and pale on the bed, I knew they were there for her. I quietly closed the door and sank to the ground taking a deep shaky breath; "I've killed her." I breathed out. I'd killed her, I'd just killed her.

The grave faces of my friends surrounding her blue tinged form was enough to make me have palpitations.

I pulled at my hair and threw myself to my feet, what had happened? Maybe she had been attacked or something. I shook my head and closed my eyes as I curled back to the floor and groaned.

But I knew, it was me, I had done it. I kissed her because I knew it would put her on edge I just… I didn't think. I suppose she was already pretty close to the edge, Jesus, what was her life? Remus was so good with secrets and Frenchy only dropped little "well it sucks basically" sort of hints. Blimey, why would I do this over a broken nose and an unflattering dye job?! I felt like I had been contaminated by the action, as if it was more Black then Sirius and shuddered. I might as well have changed my name to Bellatrix, what was wrong with me? Am I that… vindictive?

Sure she had over reacted with the whole green thing in the first place… and the list. But jeez, she's a highly reactive person, I knew that. She wore shit on her sleeve. I shook my head again, why would someone like Sabione do this? Surely if her life was that terrible, me trying it on with her wasn't going to put her in the hospital wing. Unless she had really hated me that much, how much does hating me mean to her? I liked kissing her, a lot, why was that so terrible?

Blimey, why? Stupid stupid stupid, a toddler could have seen this coming. I kissed her, she kissed me, I had a wank and she goes and dies. Sirius Black, ruining everything he touches as usual, I couldn't even be bad right. At least Regulus has method in his madness, I'm just a fucking girl breaking goon.

Poor Frenchy, what was going to happen to her? When is she going to wake up?

"She's not going to make it." I heard Poppy's sweet voice say as I pressed my back into the door.

Oh God, I've killed her, she is going to die because I got dyed green. I began to hyperventilate as I turned to face the door and began to scramble away.

Sabione. Diamond in the rough, rose with the thorns, she was fucking French, I didn't stand a chance.

I stood and approached the door, but took a step back. Didn't I always say she was a lost cause.

"What?" She questioned in an unaffected sort of voice and I spun around as if to see where the voice was coming from, am I crazy.

I turned to the door as I heard her tone continue mumbling on, she sounded fine, she probably is fine.

They don't call her antagonistic for nothing, a little thing like death wasn't going to get rid of her, thank sweet baby Jesus!

What a dame, that is the last time I give her the kiss of death and for a moment the thought of never kissing her again was worse then her dying.

Because she could survive another attempt on her life, but another kiss?

We all have an Achilles heel, even Frenchy.


	10. Jump

"You….I….are….you nearly died, and all you can say is what?" Lily asked me.

"No harm done. Just, that I have I feeling that I broke one of my fingers, my left rib, and a leg. Happy?" I complained, crossing my arms over my chest.

She rolled her eyes.

James looked at me expectantly.

"Why did you do it?" he asked me.

"Why did I what?" I asked curiously.

"Jump. Why did you jump?" James asked.

"It's a long story. You know, how when you keep all your emotions to yourself, and then you snap? Something like that…"

James's eyes glowed.

"Who made you do it? Who made you snap?" James asked fiercely. Oooh, he was Mr. Protective now.

"Sirius." Remus spoke for me.

At the mention of his name, I wanted to die. I wanted to the pain to end. I wanted to go straight to hell, even. Anyone, but him.

"Leave me….alone….please…" my voice broke.

"This isn't you. You told me you never wanted to be alone." James usually regarded me fondly, the last few days, when he wasn't around Black, he regarded me like a younger sister, along with Remus.

I shook my head.

"Please…go…."

They left, silently, like they had never been there.

What had I done that was so wrong to him? I thought over the memories of what we'd been through together.

* * *

He had "accidentally" blown his potion up on me, in first year.

"Black! What did you do to her!" Lily screeched.

"Evans….I am so sorry!" James apologized profusely.

"Mr. Black, Mr. Potter, detention for two weeks with Filch. Miss Evans, please escort Miss Leroy to the hospital wing."

Lily shot the glare of death at Black, before, catching up to me.

* * *

He used Levicorpus on me in the great hall.

"Levicorpus."

I knew there was something fishy about him today, so I made sure to wear a pair of shorts under my robes.

I got into a good position to land, cast a cushioning charm on the floor, then muttered the counter to it.

"Liberacorpus."

I landed on the floor with a deafening thud.

* * *

I sent a Bat-Bogey hex at him in third year at Hogsmeade for using the full body bind curse on Amos Diggory.

I muttered the incantation under my breath.

"Who did this?" he yelled, trying to swat the bat bogeys away.

"I did." I smiled smugly, while he stood frozen there with the bat bogeys still attacking him.

"Nice one, Violet." Remus complimented.

* * *

He got me back with a colour change charm used to change my hair green, the next day, though.

I woke up with a note on my head. It said,

"Nice try, french tart," I read aloud. "I am going to kill him."

Lily, who was seemingly amused at Black's stupidity asked,

"Need a little help? Finite Incantem."

My hair changed back to normal.

"Take that, Black. Leroy: 1, Black: 0."

* * *

He cried on me, last year, after Bellatrix decided to "teach him to play nice with her"

The great marauder, Sirius Black was crying. Was it just an illusion? Was my mind play tricks? Apparently not.

"What are you doing here, Leroy?" His eyes were red and puffy from tears.

"Taking Lily's patrolling shift. She's busy…are you crying?"

All the words he spoke as he cried, made perfect sense, since I came from a pure blood family as well. He spoke about how Bellatrix used the cruciatus curse repetitively, how she taunted him about being different. How she compared him to his brother, Regulus, to calling him a blood traitor and filth.

After that he made me swear that I wouldn't tell anyone what happened.

* * *

I actually thought he had changed. I was wrong.

Sirius Black was a git. And it didn't help that I was falling for him. I didn't help that I was falling for him at all. Damnit. Damnit all.


	11. Lady in Bed

My moment of bitter sweet celebration was short lived however as the hospital wing door swung open behind my slowly tensing body. I was definitely feeling numerous glares on the back of my head, one of them was definitely Remus's, you can always tell its him because his werewolf stuff makes the human body go all trapped animal. That shit will put you right on edge, and two of the hate eyes were girls, I never have to look to know the difference between a girl and a guy staring at me. In response to this I began to run away just as I hear Remus let out a growly

"Black!" Nope, definitely running, damn woman has Remus trained like a dog! Not that there's anything wrong with being dog like. I rounded a corner just ahead of the oncoming patter of get back here now type foot steps.

"Get back here now!" I heard Evans call out as I ducked in to an alcove. Please God don't let Remus's wolf senses tingle hard enough to stop him running. I needed to get away from this lot and check on Frenchy. The motley crew of marauders and women and basically anyone who I would invite to my funeral sprinted by and I decided I may have to have a little discussion with Frenchy regarding the usurpation of a certain group of traitorous only friends. They rounded the next corner like they were running in the Olympics and I started in the other direction. Why had they left Leroy alone? Even I know that she hates being alone.

As I reached the door to the hospital wing for the second time I didn't hesitate, my heart began to beat at a new rhythm as I peeped in. She was staring unfocusedly at the ceiling as if lost in thought. God I wanted her, just as I began to approach the bed the wait of her dark lashes seemed to drag her eyes closed. She was stupidly beautiful. I don't think I have ever thought of a girl as beautiful before, shaggable, sexy, alluring, pretty, cute, sure, but Leroy was beautiful, no doubt about it. As I reached her static figure I could see her teeth digging into her lip and her hands gripping the covers, she looked tormented.

I could smell her, she like damp and there was still that other smell. That perfume that smelt like cookies and jam or something. So delicate, barely staying.

I sounded like an idiot but everything about her was just brilliant and she hated me. I felt hurt, I felt frustrated, I felt like I was the worst person in the world. I began to pull at my hair as I sat in the chair beside her quietly. She still didn't know I was there, I liked being near her and what she didn't know couldn't hurt her, right?

Her hands had released there grip on the blankets and her breathing seemed to steady. Her soft features adopted the sort of youth you would expect from someone her age, not the usual heavy world worn look she brought around the place. She really felt it all, I couldn't help but think that even if she had everything the world would still wear on her. She was always at odds with the world, with me.

My heart took up its sporadic rhythm once again as I stood and walked across the wing. Pomfrey was bent over a box for some sexy nurse reason.

"Tease." I called to her to get her attention. She turned to me looking scandalised and then rolled her eyes before walking over.

"Oh its you Black, I suppose you wondering about your lady in bed?" I nodded solemnly.

"What happened?" I asked quietly.

"She jumped in the lake." Poppy gave a sad smile, "She won't be happy to see you but she is in a well enough state to leave the wing. She is an a fragile state Black but I think it would be good for you to talk to her."

I nodded slowly, and then turned to her jauntily

"You're a real peach, Poppy."

"You are incorrigible." She batted me away and walked toward her office, "Make sure she gets plenty of rest, I'm sure she'll listen to you." Pomfrey laughed and I huffed.

"Very funny." I muttered. Sabione had fallen in to a still sleep and I leaned close to her. I rested fore head on her without really thinking and took her hand in mine.

"You really are some dame." I whispered as a little tear escaped my eye. I was so ashamed to have hurt her.

I wanted to kiss her so much but I had already promised myself I wouldn't.

I inhaled a deep breath of her and watched my own tear slip down her cheek.

"I'm so so sorry Sabione." I whispered as I ran my thumb over her hand. I made to move away and I felt her delectable little tongue sneak out to taste my top lip as I was retreating. I shivered and groaned quietly.

"That's bull." She hissed out as she opened her dreamy violet eyes, I could see the flecks of purple punctuating the blue "you're a coward Black." she scratched out and I wondered if she was going to kiss me again as I felt her warm breath fan across my mouth.


	12. Screaming

"That's bull." I hissed, my eyes flickered open, I leaned in closer and pulled away. He was distracted for a moment, and I took this chance to continue, "and you know it."

Even though I was falling for him, we both knew he had to admit the fact first, before I was going to say anything. I stared into the depth of his mesmerizingly beautiful grey eyes. I could see hurt, acceptance, and a spark of what I thought was hope, which faded, and was replaced by….an incoherent feeling I couldn't recognize, one I couldn't comprehend.

"Look…..Sabione…I messed up. I stuffed up. I'm sorry-" He tried to apologize.

I cut him off before he could continue. This was the worst apology of the century. He stuffed up? No. He screwed my life up. He messed up? No. He messed everything up. It would take a lot more than an apology for anything to change.

"Don't say my name. It means nothing to someone like you." I whispered harshly.

"What do you want me to call you?" He asked me in exasperation.

"That doesn't matter. Apologies won't help anything. To apologize, from you is meaningless. You know it means nothing to you when you say you're sorry," I paused and took a breath and continued, "When you apologize, you don't mean it. I can see that you don't mean it. When let's say someone like….James. Or Lily and Remus. When they apologize, they mean it. Their eyes will fill with hurt, depression and apology. They mean it. You don't." I told him.

Anger filled his eyes.

"I don't mean it, Sabione?" he asked angrily, with no more traces of any other emotion.

"Do not say my name," I repeated, "It doesn't make any difference to you. How many names of the girls you've slept with, or snogged, do you even remember, Sirius?"

He opened his mouth, then closed it.

"You don't remember, do you? Just like I said. It's the same as any old girl's name you've snogged. A title to throw away later, after you've broked her heart," I snapped. "Have you ever thought, a girl might have loved you? And you might have hurt her? Girls, are nothing to you are they? Only play toys to keep you busy, obstacles that you use to distract yourself, instead of facing what problems, should be yours. Rosanne Lyone, a year lower than us, she was heart-broken when you told her, it was a fling, and you and her was over. You just break everyone's heart." I told him what little truth I still had left.

"And you're any better? Getting everyone to do your dirty work? Recruiting James and Remus as your bodyguards? Lily and Marlene as your maids?" he asked me, angrily.

It carried more hurt, when he said James and Remus, instead of Prongs and Moony, and Lily and Marlene instead of Evans and McKinnon.

"Just get out, Black. I thought you were different, that you changed. I was wrong. You haven't changed at all. Get out, Black, get out of my sight."

He turned away and walked out of the hospital wing.

I could faintly hear Lily screaming at him.

Nothing had changed between us. Because everything had.


	13. Reasons to be Cheerful

As soon as I stepped out of the wing a regretted it, I should have had a better go at it, Holy fucking Godric in glory Black, you inarticulate dunderhead, would it kill a man to apologise like a woman for once in his life?

"Maggoty Merlin's mutated man holes Black! You loathsome pompous dunderhead! Would it kill you to act like a man and not an infant for once in your life?" Stupid, slightly off, psychic Lily. She continued to echo my various self berating thoughts as I turned to her with a scowl on my face, she approached, flanked by James and I thought this might have been one of those Scooby doo type situations where James, the leader, had paired himself with Daphne in his ingenious plan to "split up and look for clues" in search of a certain bad dog.

"Don't even think about it!" I heard Evans cry as I was poised to run. I flinched as I saw her wand drawn,

"Are you going to kill me Mrs. Potter?" I coughed and recoiled further as my brilliant humour failed to placate the redhead, James did look a bit chuffed though, underneath all the fist clenching and attempts to not stare at Evans "heavenly physique which would rival, nay, out do that of Helen of Troy in a heart beat!"

He really could run for prat of the year and win. By all that I of course meant, better deal with the issue at hand and not get my tail zapped off. My bushy bush wacker of a tail would really hold no charm attached to a hat if I was to have it detached from my bum, maybe a tie.

"I agree with whatever it is you just said and am going to begin working on that immediately." I cried before jumping from the ledge standing over various mobile stairs and clinging to the nearest banister for dear life as I heard James and Lily yelling and hoped that there concern for me would unite them so they could shut up and shag already.

"Don't die Padfoot, then who would be my friend?" James cried and Lily elbowed him as he resorted to comedic dramatics when I was still hanging from the shifting stairwell, quite close to death really, slip of the hand and splat.

"Don't worry Prongsie, we were never that close anyway, tell Frenchy to avenge meeeeee!" I called out as the stairs slipped me out of sight and I pulled myself onto solid ground once more.

"Oh my goodness! Stop laughing Potter, what if he's hurt?" honestly, girls could be so dramatic, it wasn't even that much of a fatal plummet, with a gargantuan amount of luck I may have even kept two out of four limbs had I fallen, and I like those odds. James had done much worse, snitch snatching show off that he was, the stairs didn't just move around so that people would NOT go diving off the ledge in an attempt to avoid Evans brazen wand wavery once in a while.

I strolled up the stairs onto what I believed to be the ninth floor and decided that a trip to the astonomy tower might clear my head.

Jesus, I wonder if Leroy new I had cried on her, I mean it was only a little but still. I think once is enough to go snotting on a girl who would rather die then bare living after kissing you. I know! I'll ask her to marry me! Chicks dig marriage!

Although Frenchy did seem a little, I don't know, liberal? For that sort of thing. I just need her to believe that she was different from other girls,

I pushed the large black door open as I reached the astronomy tower and had a good ganger at the grounds. Is Frenchy different from other girls? I mean, aside from being better looking and French and a total bitch and a total challenge and a bigger prankster then me…

Well heck, that was enough to love a girl over right there, but there was a whole other level with her, with Sabione.

"Sabione." I whispered her name aloud. No, saying her name was definitely not a throw away like it was with other girls. Ok well, maybe I will plan mentally this time. If a teensie bit of really well thought out planning done by me could cause this much anarchy, then Sirius Black working in the name of… well, some chick? It ought to be a breeze.

To win Sabione, don't be a knob, make lotsa big gestures… tell her she is cool.

No I sound like James…

Tell her she is totally shaggable but you are only in it for the ride! No, that is like opposite land.

Maybe I should just be a friend and tempt her with my other wordly sexiness untill she gives in and realises that I appreciate her as a person as well as really really really fucking wanting to shag her.

Oh God, stop thinking about her mouth, anything but her sinful mouth, heck her tits were better to think about then her mouth, oh bollocks, not her tits too.

I had my head rested on the edge of a railing now and my legs hanging off the edge of the tower and the last thing I needed was a semi, especially when a certain social escapist decided to get away from her overly protective and concerned friends by seeking refuge in the astronomy tower while shifting her smooth black hair over her shoulder in a totally sensual, don't look at me like I'm sensual way. Oh fuck.

I needed to talk to her or touch her or explain to her or maybe just fucking touch her.

Oh for fuck sake Black, she's a lady, get to know the child first, maybe?

I shrunk to the shadows as she gazed up at the sky, what is the point in thinking about her mouth or getting to know her when she wants you to go to hell and stay there?

But she saw me then and smiled, I suddenly felt like I had a reason to be cheerful.

Black: one

Remus: everything else.

That kid was such a smile hog, none the less, a big stupid grin broke across my face.

"I think you're great, you know?" I blurted. She turned back to the sky and shrugged.

"Yeah, I know." She laughed a little and then went back inside. I had to go after her, lost cause or no.

I'd found my demon and now I was going to go to fucking hell and stay there, there was no further to fall. I was on fire.

I got to my feet clumsily, Sabione Leroy, something's never change.


	14. Masquerade

(Lily POV)

Sirius who seemed to be following Sabione, entered the common room. Sabione sat down on an armchair by the fire. Warily, I watched Sirius, in case he was going to do something to upset her. I was examining the notice board for any new events. A lavender notice caught my eye. I read aloud,

"Masquerade Ball for the departure of Professor Mirabelle Sightese? They expect us to attend a ball for the divination teacher?" I exclaimed.

For a divination professor? No one paid attention to them. Even I, Lily Evans, the "teacher's pet" can't pay attention to Sightese predicting my death, or a lecture about reading tea leaves. This seemed to have gotten Sabione's attention, who was now reading it over my shoulder.

She read the starter of the next paragraph,

"Bring a date? Oh, yeah…so that's what he meant…. I am not bringing a date. Wait…yes I am…" A smile crept up her face, "Remus," she began, "Go to the ball with me?"

"Sure," Remus smiled, then added, "I thought there was someone who wanted to ask you, though,"

He shot a smug smirk at Black, which was uncommon for a Remus Lupin.

"Doesn't a particular Black, want to ask you?" I asked Sabione.

She raised her eyebrows, then realized what we were talking about. Or not.

"Regulus asked me to the ball, before, but I didn't know what he was talking about then…so I just said no….oh man….I turned down an offer with him!" Her voice cascaded in volume from light talk, to a shriek.

She shook her head.

"Poor Regulus…next time I'll ask him…maybe I'll ask him to Hogsmeade…" she whispered.

Sirius was tensing, at the fact that his brother had asked Sabione out, and that she was considering asking him to Hogsmeade. Everyone knew Sirius liked her, except for Sabione, oblivious the obvious fact, constantly waving in her face.

A smile lit up on Potter's face.

"Did I just hear that right? Go to the ball with me, Evans?" He asked.

"No." I said firmly. This was dangerous ground he was entering. The volcano was going to explode.

"Go out with me, Evans?"

"POTTER! YOU ARROGANT TOERAG! I ALREADY TOLD YOU! I AM NOT GOING OUT WITH YOU UNLESS THE APOCALYPSE COMES! I AM-"

My yelling was cut off by Sabione.

"Whoa, Lily!"

(Sabione's POV)

"Whoa, Lily!" I exclaimed. "Calm down! James, Lily is going to kill you soon."

Lily muttered a few incoherent words under her breath that sounded like,

"i'mgoingwithsomoneelse…."

I translated into English for them,

"She's going with someone else."

James froze, and showed no mercy for the boy who asked her out.

I turned to Lily,

"Did he ask you to the ball?"

Recently, Lily had been spending a lot of time with Amos Diggory.

"Yeah…him."

I regretted the words that managed to escape my mouth.

"Lily is going with….Amos Diggory."


	15. Square one

Chapter 15

Sqaure One

I followed her the whole way down to the common room and she would just look back and shake her head and say something like;

"Stop staring Black you voyeur!" and she walked on coquettishly. This was progress, no cursing, she was obviously in a good mood even though I was near her. You know, every time she let out a breathy laugh in her dulcet husky voice I couldn't help but think that she liked the attention. My attention! When we entered the common room I was tripping over myself I was so happy. When she sat down by the fire I felt like I had seen more of her, just walking through the castle, receiving little smiles in profile as she retreated coyly than I had seen since we were kids and she had actually listened to me talk. Kids… could it have been much more than a year since I last cried on her?

I thought for sure that this meant something, this sort of transition, that me and Sabione had been thrown into. The change between us, perhaps I could finally find a way to show her that I had always sucked at not thinking about her. That she was the one girl full of trouble who I couldn't dismiss. The one cause I was lost too, if I had to have a weakness, it would have been her, always her. The fire glowed off her skin and I saw her eyes flash, bad sign.

Evans streaked across my vision in a blaze of fiery red hair. She had changed her perfume to Jasmine. I mean, I may be a fella, but I know perfume due to plenty of hand on experience. That stuff was meticulously selected with some girls and I can only think of one reason for a change from White Lily spray smelly stuff to Jasmine. James was in fact, whether he knew it or not, heck whether he would ever know it or not. He wasn't dancing on his own in the dark anymore, but was I?

"Masquerade Ball for the departure of Professor Mirabelle Sightese?" She shook her head "They expect us to attend a ball for the divination teacher?"

The reaction was predictable, James asked Lily before anyone took a breath and almost got killed. Remus, well Remus won. As usual, not to mention I had to beat up my brother, again! Well Remus getting involved was one thing, I mean it fucking wrecked my head but my contemptible younger sibling? Well he was already taller then I was at his age so if he has that then the French girl is mine.

I mean, it couldn't be any other way; by first year I had scouted her, she was the first girl I ever saw differently from boys, by third year I wanted to kiss her more the anyone else and by fourth, I was already plagued with images of her wrapped in white silk and flashing a rock.

I mean, it was never a fairy tale to me, it was a well coveted fantasy. But I know it, Sweet baby Jesus I know, great tits are not everything. To bad every time I try and convince myself that the woman is just that with a heap of trouble, she proves me wrong.

I felt deflated and ran my hands through my hair. No, it didn't mean anything. Square one? Why hello, its been a while! Miss me?

"Marlene?" I called across the common room after throwing a scowl at Leroy and throwing a paper weight at Remus who caught it and rolled his eyes. The blonde emerged from some crevice with her arms folded and some lad fell out behind her looking pleased with himself and a little dazed, good old McKinnon, I knew that look well. Now don't look at this the wrong way. Is Marlene a slut, you ask? No. She's a man eater, big difference, much more stingy but a bit addictive when you get used to it… or if you aren't it's a lot addictive.

"There is a ball and you are beautiful!" I called over. She ran her fingers through her hair from the moment and glanced at the blushing boy beside her before shrugging.

"Go on then Black," She called over, to the coppery haired boys dismay; "get out your glad rags" She flicked her hand a bit before adding as an after thought;

"No funny business though, or you'll have it." She pulled the boy, who looked to be a Ravenclaw in his last year, back into the alcove from whence they came and he followed with the sort of helplessness that accompanied most of Marlene's beaux's by the time she brought them to the common room.

"Wouldn't dream of it!" I called over and then sighed.

Square one.

I looked at Leroy and saw her staring into the fire looking detached. I sat next to her and clasped my hands together, I leaned forward to look at her face more fully.

"Marlene and I are only friends really, you know?" I tried, nothing. I continued; "With Marlene I can wake up the next day and feel like myself. But if you said you might change your mind, heck. Even the smallest amount, about, well. Your feelings toward me,? You know I would go stag everyday until the day you came through Sabione." She was struggling to maintain her unimpressed façade, that much was clear. But something needed to be said, life is to short to draw this many circles, there were to many already. She turned to me sadly and looked me straight in the eye for the first time in what felt like a long time. Violet.

"The feelings I have for you Black, will never change from what they are now." she said it like it broke her heart but then her ruby lip curled in distain as she continued; "So do me a favour and don't say my fucking name again Black, not unless you are somehow someone else." I looked down and bit into the edge of my cheek for a moment, her name, it obviously meant a lot to her, then it occurred to me;

"Say my name." I ordered her, as my eyes flew back to her face. She looked stuck, I moved closer and let my breath move over her face as I commanded her again.

"Say my name, please." I stared at her mouth and refused to move away. She was frowning and she breathed in through her nose sharply.

"Don't you dare tell me what to do and get out of my face, you so close I can smell you." She continues to look uncomfortable as I let out a light chuckle.

"If you say it, I'll leave right now. Get to bed early. Wouldn't you prefer that, if you hate me so irrevocably." I needed her to not hate me.

"Sirius." she whispered, in a warning sort of tone but she did have a point about names, there was something to it. I felt a bit of a shift and my heart rate picked up.

"Again." my voice scratched out of my throat and I moved closer still.

"Sirius," and I inhaled sharply, catching on to her chocolate scent, "fuck off." She finished and I sighed.

"Sorry." I stood, "I didn't- I'm going." She looked at me like I was an idiot and I ran my hand over the back of my neck. I suppose I am an idiot, I couldn't even get the girl.

"Your name isn't like everyone else's." I tried to explain but James cut across;

"Obviously not Sirius her name is French." I looked at her and she gazed up at me with a tender, gentle expression.

"Good night, Sirius." she cooed but her eyes flashed menacingly as my breath caught a little.

She had it figured now, she could see that she had an effect on me.

What was she playing at?

I hoped that the dam would break before she figured out how light the river was.

Square one.


	16. Choose One

"Hey." A familiar voice called over my shoulder.

"Sirius?" I asked, curiously, he usually never talked to me these days leading up to the ball, unless it was forced conversation.

He let out a small chuckle.

"You wish. Since when were you and my brother on first name terms?"

My eyes widened.

"Regulus?"

He rolled his eyes, with a slight ghost of a smirk on his face.

"Who else do you know that looks like my brother and isn't me? The bloody baron? Wait, my bad, he does look like the bloody baron."

I grinned.

"So true." I agreed.

He sat down next to me.

"Who do you think is going to win the next quidditch match? No one beats Slytherin."

"Oh? And what happens to make you think that? Gryffindor kicks Slytherin's arse. James is one of the best chasers we've ever had." I countered.

"You can't know that unless you can play quidditch. I knew you could play, you just didn't bother to audition for the team. What position?" he inquired.

"You'll just have to find out….." I said slyly with a mysterious air to it.

And the banter began. I was more carefree and relaxed with Regulus. I had met him a year before I ran away, when I was eight at a pure blood society type conference. We had gotten along well, unlike when I had met Sirius, who was being an idiot. Ever since then we had been close, until we lost contact when I was nine. We were still friends, and nobody cared that I was around him, not even the purebloods. Even now after I was disowned, the Slytherins and death eaters still believed they could turn me onto You-Know-Who's side.

"You are so like your brother, except I know you too well." I sighed and shook my head.

"I can't say the same to you. Your brother and you are way different."

"I'm not a death eater parading around with You-Know-Who with a mask on, yelling random unforgivable curses out." I mimicked Louis putting a mask on, and jumping off a cliff after Voldemort.

We both burst into laughter. I could hear footsteps gradually coming closer to us.

"Sabione." No doubt the person who had spoken it was Sirius.

"I told you not to say my name." I said, making sure I had no emotion left on my face.

"Leroy." He said coldly.

"What do you want?" I asked, I was perfectly fine here.

"Sabione is fine here, brother." Regulus interjected.

"I need to talk to you." Sirius crossed his arms over his chest.

"Talk." I said, irritated that he was taking so long.

"Alone." His gaze never moved from staring into my eyes.

"Choose one." A cold, high voice spoke. "Choose one and they get to live, and so do you. Pick one and you along with them will join my forces."

One side was Regulus and the other was Sirius. They were both tied up in ropes and were mentally screaming at me, "PICK ME" like they were the cake and the drink labeled in bold letters "EAT ME" from the muggle fairytale Alice in Wonderland.

"You have limited time, Sabione. If you don't pick in time, you will die. Choose." The voice continued, "Your family is an ancient family, the Leroys, with rare pure-blood, you have talent. It would be a waste. Choose. Your time is running out."

A table appeared with an hour glass, and the fine grains of sand were filling the bottom half quickly.

The man who spoke appeared in the middle beside Sabione, and fingered a strand of her raven hair.

Voldemort.

"Sabione, you must choose now, to live." He reminded her.

She spoke.

"I choose-"

I woke up in my bed with a jolt. I was sweating heavily underneath the covers, and the nightmare I had was haunting me.

Choose one, he had said.

What had it all meant? Reality was key to this challenge, to this puzzle of a sort.

"Are you alright, Sabione? You were thrashing and yelling in your sleep." Lily told me, obviously concerned.

"I'm fine. Fine." I tried to convince myself.

I was stumped. Just stumped.


	17. Begging

Begging

"Alone." I glanced at Regulus and then back ay her guarded eyes. She looked a little bewildered for a moment but then put her hand on Reg's delicately, keeping her eyes on me.

"I'll talk to you later Regulus, I have to go deal with a same shit different day sort of situation." Regulus looked down at her hand and stood, the kid was still growing, better figure out how to make a shrinking draft or something because this whole "Regulus is the tall one" just wouldn't stand.

"Stay out of trouble Violet." Regulus said to her amicably before bowing to kiss her hand with that silly smirk which he stole from me after I borrowed it from Frenchie. Damned little supremacist that he was.

Sabione watched him walk away as I barged over to her.

"Leroy?" I called her attention to me and she gave me a bored look. Which simply wouldn't do, I would rather she punched me then looked at me like she could care less. I sat beside her on the arched out crop of the pale stoned corridor. She rested her arm on her knee and placed her head in her hand, her hair swept down like a curtain of satin. She really wasn't helping me say what I came here to say.

The ball was this Friday and I had been avoiding Sabione for over three weeks but she didn't seem to care. I hoped to God that was enough time for her to recover emotionally after the… incident as most people had come to call it.

I liked to call it, "The best dumb thing I ever did", I had such a bizarre measure of shame, pride and hope in relation to that three minute thirty second interval of raw sexual need and unreciprocated heart healing bliss. I had felt whole and torn apart in those moments, and every moment spent near her following it.

I was a fool to open this particular can of worms but I just cant stay mad at myself.

I turn and stare at the wall opposite which features a rather dull tapestry of two wizards arguing over a frog.

"Did you just call me over here to waste my time and sit next to me Black or do you need something?" She asked this in an unaffected tone and I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes.

"If you could have any one wish Leroy, what would you wish for?" I asked quietly as I stared at the wall ahead, not daring to look at her. She scoffed;

"I didn't want you over here so I could philosophise with you, Black." I could sense her eye rolling even from my position turned away from her. She made to stand and I twined my hand around hers.

"Don't" I croak as my heart rate picks up, her hands felt warm and weathered in my own.

"Answer me" I needed to hear an answer, any answer. She tries to pull her hand from mine but I hold firm;

"You are friends with Regulus, aren't you?" I turned the question as she continued to wiggle her fingers uncomfortably and glare at me.

"So what if I am?" She defended and I looked at her tough delicate hand in my larger almost softer one.

"Save him, won't you?" I was pleading a little with this, I knew that Reg was long past glowy eyed idolization of rebellious me. Sabione had more of a shot then his over emotional older brother, the diva, regaling him with stories of muggle kings slaughtering dragons with just there swords wasn't going to clean his already thoroughly pure washed brain these days. Sabione eventually wriggled her hand free and I saw her fold her arms in my periphery vision before she heaved an unfairly sexy sigh. Damn it Sirius! don't look.

"Regulus wont need a push or a shove when push comes to shove, he knows himself. Being your own person and resisting isn't always done the way we did it. Sometimes I think Regulus has the right idea." She was trying to tell me something without really telling me anything. I could tell, it's a classic girl tool used to get around keeping secrets. All I really got was "right idea" and I know Sabione isn't going to be cozying up to cousin Bella any time soon so I would trust her to know what exactly the "right idea" is.

"I'll take your word for it." I said quietly, staring blankly at the wall, trying to forget who I was talking to so that I could actually talk to her. Its so much easier to not be a blithering idiot when its not Sabione I am dealing with. She just gets me all shook up.

"If that's all you needed then Black, I hope you don't remain so eternally inept that you shrug off your only decent flesh and blood." She moved to stand again and I put my hand on her shoulder to keep her seated before standing from my own seat and bending at the waist in front of her. I looked straight into her eyes and saw every delicate, purposeful intonation within.

"I amnt allowed to say your name because it means nothing to me, is that it?" Her eyes narrowed as she shrugs her shoulder out from under my hand. I brace it against the wall behind her. Bringing my face closer to hers, the length of one of her dainty hand between us. She nods tightly;

"Yes, for the thousandth time, my name isn't a kinky tool to be used against me by the likes of you Black. I'm not you toy, I'm a woman."

She pressed back against the wall and lifted her chin proudly as she looked at me. She was sexy when she got all riled though, hair all on edge, quick breath, pinked cheeks, dark, flashing eyes. Like Persephone, half heaven, half hell and bringing the Spring with her.

"Are you sure," I leaned closer, forgetting myself as the torches in the hall lit and the sun set. She let off an ambient glow, I inhaled sharply, always, always, chocolate. I started again;

"Are you sure it doesn't have more to do with what me saying your name means to you, Sabione?" I coaxed it out, she began to straighten against the indentured wall and as she stood, one foot folded on the bench and the other was planted aside mine on the ground. I had one knee rested on the bench as well and was an inch from being pressed flush against her. As I said her name her body gave a little and shaped itself to mine, as perfectly as any body could. My blood thrummed through me and my hands shook a little as her bedroom eyes fell shut slowly;

"Sirius," she murmured in a warning tone; "Don't ask questions that you know you aren't going to get an answer too."

"Look at me." but she didn't she turned her face away. I lifted my hand from where it had been at my side and brushed her jet black hair over her shoulder. Her hair was so fine and soft. "Sabione;" I whispered gently against her ear, "look at me." Her body, still pressed to mine seemed to melt into me but she wouldn't look at me.

"Stop it, Black, this isn't funny." She sounded hurt and angry. I placed a softened kiss onto the column of her straining neck.

"Stop it." She hissed as she pressed her hand to my shoulder as if to push me away. I let a hot breath onto her neck and then placed a not so chaste kiss on her pulse point. Her hand betrayed her and pulled me closer, I began to suck her impossibly soft skin gently. She was driving me crazy, hot and cold and sweet and soft and taut and I never wanted to take my lips off her skin again if I could help it.

"Sirius," She breathed out and I pressed my hips against hers, nipping her skin lightly. She was so erotic, everything about her, every damned thing about her!

"Sirius," she said again and I hoped to god this was her surrender as I moved against her once more. She responded in kind, I let out a guttural moan, I hadn't been expecting it. I was lost to her after that, I needed to kiss her, to really kiss her. The teasing taste of her skin was enough to drive me mad but I needed to feel the give of her impossibly soft lips against mine again. My hands slipped to her waist and into her hair.

I guided her to face me. Sabione's hand chose this moment to heed her twisted reason however and she began to push me away. Oh God, please no! No no no no.

"Sabione, please." I begged. Having put a preferred distance between us she looked at me, her eyes were wide her mouth slightly agape. I wondered if she could hear my roaring heart as I leaned back a small amount. Fuck this could not keep happening. I saw another flash in her eyes and lurched back, narrowly avoiding a swinging fist. Maybe I could make things work with Sabione, I would just have to work on my reflexes.

"Are you," Frenchie seemed at a loss for a moment as she retracted her fist and laughed a bit. "You were!" she finished and began laughing heartily. My pulse continued to rage in my ears and I had half a mind to insist that she finish what she started but Leroy had other ideas as she seemed ready to suffocate from laughter.

"What?" I asked, raising an eyebrow and crossing my arms. She was laughing so hard that she had stumbled slightly and was now clinging to one of my crossed arms to keep her off the ground.

"You," she breathed in heavily, "were begging me! Me!" Her laughter continued and I detached on my arm petulantly. Bad idea, her arm slipped over my cock on the way down and my eyes fell shut.

Usually the best boner killer is a chick laughing at it for existing, or so say the rumours, I don't have much personal experience. However as Frenchie began to writhe ecstatically on the floor I didn't find it solving my predicament at all, heck if anything, I was in a worse stat then I had ever been.

Sabione suddenly popped back to her feet, wiping away a few stray tears and shaking her head.

"You are truly a pathetic boy, Black." She shook her head and began to walk off but I took her hand and brushed her knuckles with my over sensitive mouth. She snatched her hand back and rolled her eyes but she didn't punch me. I began grinning like an idiot as she walked away.

"When was I ever not begging for you?" I called after her, I then blushed at how it sounded once I had said it aloud.

Alas" I suppose. Frenchie didn't pause but I know that that little bum wiggle at the end of the hall, it was just for me. She'll be the death of me.

I coughed awkwardly as I stood alone in the corridor, wanting her more and more by the second even after she had gone.

Remus could have her for the ball, but I was going to win this war.


	18. The Fragile Play Quidditch

"What time is it?" I asked Lily.

"Around six….why?" she asked.

I glanced out the window, and it was the perfect weather to go for a run.

"I might go for a jog…" I told her.

"I never thought you were the athletic type." She smiled.

"Really?" I smiled slyly, like the one that I head given Regulus yesterday, "I can play quidditch as a chaser, and usually do some sort of sport. I'm not as fragile as I look."

I changed into a pair of black running shorts and a t-shirt. Who was going to see me? Hopefully Black didn't come along and gape at my legs, or something. No one was in the common room, or anywhere. Which was good, actually. As I was jogging, I quickened my pace. I ran faster, then slowed down to a jog again. After a few rounds, as I was jogging past the quidditch pitch, I saw all the players there. They had been practicing. And they were packing up. Oh, crap, he was going to see my legs.

I broke into sprint when I realized James had seen me.

"Sabione!" he waved over at me, for him to come over there.

Black was with him. I decided I would face them. It was now or never. As I predicted, he started gaping at my legs. I cocked an eyebrow and smiled.

"Like what you see?" I asked him, and leant closer to him. He obviously thought I was going to start snogging him, but I pulled away, and he tripped face first into the ground.

I burst out in laughter, along with James, who had seen what I was going to do.

"Really, Black, did you think I was going to start randomly snogging you?" I could only shake my head in amusement.

James broke the awkwardness by asking if I played quidditch.

"Chaser." I blurted out, "I mean, I can play chaser." I corrected myself.

He looked impressed, "I didn't know you could play! You seem like the type...that...is extremely fragile."

I had to laugh at that statement, then I smiled.

"Nice to know you think so highly of me." I told him, sarcasm evident in my voice, "I just am accident prone, and when i'm in the middle of recovering, I have another accident, which is why I look so fragile all the time."

"We'll see about that, hmm? Pass the quaffle over and lets test your skills."

"Hey! What about me!" Black seemed to have snapped out of his little fantasy, or reverie about my legs.

"You're a beater, not a chaser! Get lost!" James said playfully. I stuck my tongue out at him, indicating, that I had won whatever game he was playing at.

"Anyway, you're on, James. You are so on." I smirked in hopes of winning whatever came next.

James, he had so much to learn.


	19. KISSING!

I decided that standing around torturing myself with the sight of a scantily dressed Frenchie was just cruel and made my way back to the castle. The entrance hall was deserted and I heard a familiar giggle emanating from near by. Approaching the mahogany door of a broom closet which I was very familiar with (it had a window with curtains, very snazzy) I strained my ears further;

"For goodness sake Remus, stop! Stop!" Marlene giggled playfully. Moony you old dog! I heard his breathy laughter as he shushed McKinnon.

"Shhhh shh… lock the door!" I rolled my eyes at his ever practical mind, who was going to stumble upon them in this part of the school and this time of day anyway? I literally blanched and face palmed at my own stupidity as I eavesdropped from outside the door.

"Don't be so paranoid Lupin!" She hissed in response. Exactly! See? It was common practice between those of us well versed in broom closet lore "lock shmock" I believe is the exact phrasing of the olde Hogwartian proverb. This verbal exchange was soon followed by some heavy breathing and bumping and everything became sort of dull after that. I jumped back from the door in shock as it rattled threateningly, I realised the heated couple had found there way to this side of the cupboard. There was a little gasp from Marlene which I was surprisingly unfamiliar with, damn quiet ones, with there tricks that even get new noises out of McKinnon.

There was a dull click and I rolled my eyes as the door rattled from the release of their weight. Moony had locked it.

Remus really does always get his way in the end, with women anyway. He's "sensitive", that's like his niche, I wish I had thought of that, damn being a bad boy. Whose idea was that? I scowled as a little "oh" escaped the girl in the wardrobe, maybe chicks really do dig scars I hummed thoughtfully before making to leave.

I continued my meandering through the castle, Remus could have Marlene, this did give me minimally one assurance. There was no real romantic confusion between Leroy and Moony, he wouldn't be taking more then one girl into a broom closet at a time. Poor kid must be hung up on McKinnon, well I wish him luck, Blondie's high maintenance at the best of times. Well, if you were involved. She was s very low maintenance friend with extras.

I wonder if Leroy liked Remus more than he liked her. No, Remus is to clever for that to, he wouldn't go to the ball with her if it meant something different to her than it did him. Poxy gentlemanly show off that he was. Why can't I tell what Sabione feels and stuff. Oh God, Sabione, Sabione's legs, Sabione's flighty pulse when I kissed her neck, her stubborn bite and her sly tongue. Even though I knew there was nothing between them, I was still jealous of Remus. I sighed and decided to head down to the kitchens.

When I did eventually reach the fruit filled painting I tried to remember which pear opened the portrait hole and which one farted when it was tickled. There was a load clank from one of the suits of armour on the corner and I quickly turned to see who was approaching.

Well, well, well, who should it be but a far to happy Remus Lupin. He really didn't look all that different than usually, typically dishevelled and bruised. If I didn't know better I would have thought the trail of bruises leading into under his collar to be nothing out of the ordinary. He gave me a classic mediating Lupin smile and approached as if nothing was out of the ordinary, maybe it wasn't.

"Sweet tooth at you again Moony?" I asked casually, turning a faux puzzled face to the portrait in an attempt to mask my amusement. He took a slow breath and shrugged.

"I missed lunch actually." He reached forward and tickled the pear on the left as the painting swung forward into the wall. I span and barked a laugh;

"You dog! you've been shacked up with McKinnon since before lunch?" I turned open mouthed at Remus and he gave me a "who told you" look. I reached forward and wiped a smidgeon of deep red from Remus's ear and held it out to show him. He rolled his eyes and walked ahead into the kitchen;

"I hear you put your mouth on Violet, again!" Remus responded in a similar teasing tone and I thought of her sweet skin. My mouth felt fizzy when I thought back to all the sensations I got whenever she was near, flashing her soft skin, God, her legs.

"Sirius?" Remus was shaking his head at me, I opened my mouth but he waved me off.

"You are getting like James Padfoot, just mention her and off you go." He rolled his eyes at me and I jumped the steps of the small passage into the kitchens to grab at Remus.

"You take that back right this second Moony," I cried as we grappled for harmlessly for a moment; "I am having way more success then James!" I managed to coerce the tussled boy into a head lock.

"You're deluding yourself Black, you know you would put a ring on her if you got the chance and your not even 17!" Lupin laughed from my armpit. I smiled broadly but then said in a serious voice (Sirius voice);

"You take it back you son of a wolf, Heirs to the most noble and ancient house of smack talk will not be put down by the likes of poo!" I felt a hand grip the back of my robe and looked back in confusion to see no one. I then realised it was Remus's hand and found myself winded on the flat of my back on the floor. Moony pinned me to the ground, he was almost crying with laughter.

"Black and Leroy sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I" I cut him off with my own chorus of

"Lupin loves Marly-ene, Lupin loves Marly-ene!" Things kind of digressed from there and we decided that maybe it would be best to get some onion rings from the kitchen and bring them back for our beloveds in time for the ball.


	20. Dresses

I knew I belonged to the public and to the world, not because I was talented or even beautiful, but because I had never belonged to anything or anyone else.

- Marilyn Monroe

If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair.

- C. S. Lewis

Lily started screaming at the boys. I mean screaming or something worse than that. Everyone thought she was PMSing. No, really, they did.

It was all the stress of the ball. I found myself sitting on Marlene's bed, complaining to Alice about why I couldn't wear any dress that wasn't a violet shade or black tone, without looking terrible.

"Alice, I look terrible in everything! And I'm bored of purple, magenta, violet, grey, black and white. What do I do?" I complained.

And that was my point.

"Violet…you know what dress you're wearing, the violet gown with a black sash, right?" she asked me.

"I'm tired of violet, black and every other colour ever made." I told her.

"Well, you're still wearing it, we spent ages looking for a dress that looked good on you. You kept on complaining on every single dress or gown."

I stepped out of the changing room, and showed them the dress I was wearing. It was sure to go into the pile of unwanted dresses, I felt like I was wearing a pile of purple cloth.

"Ugly, right?" I asked them, it sure didn't feel good.

"Yep." The girls chorused.

I stepped into the changing rooms again, and picked up the first piece of violet cloth I could see. It was a strapless gown, and was elegantly patterned with intricate detail. An embellishment, a black sash tied into a bow was pinned across the waist. I fingered the material. It had a kind of lace-ish feel to it, although it was soft.

I sighed, this dress was not going to fit me.

I was wrong. One glance in the mirror showed everything. I placed a hand on the mirror and shook my head. The reflection inside the mirror wasn't me. After all, this mirror could have been enchanted once, the magical world had never been safe at all.

"Sabione! You've been in there for a while! Come out and show the dress before I blast the door open! It can't be that horrible can it?" the unmistakable voice of Lily Evans floated from the ebony cushioned bench.

Reluctantly, I stepped outside of the sophisticated velvet curtains covering the entrance back inside the changing room.

A small gasp escaped Marlene's lips, followed by the rest of the girls. The marauders, who happened to be walking by, stood there, just gaping.

"It's not that bad is it?" I asked Marlene worriedly, and drew back. She was supposed to be the best at fashion expertise.

Marlene sighed happily. "The opposite, actually. After a day's worth of shopping, this is worth it."

After I had put on my dress, endured the torture of Alice's hair styling, escaped the wraths of Lily's make up chair, I was now almost ready, except, for the picking of the masks and jewelry.

"Lily," Marlene addressed her, "You'd look good with a emeralds," she threw a box containing emerald accessories at her, which wasn't a surprise seeing as Marlene's muggle cousin was a jeweler, "Amber for you, Alice," another pristine white box was thrown across the room, "Onyx or amethyst?" she pondered over what jewel would suit me more, and speculated, "I think onyx is more classic, amethyst is a bit too vibrant," A box found its way into my lap, Marlene continued, "Which leaves sapphire or amethyst for me, sapphire."

Onyx earrings and a pearl necklace were the only accessories I wore. By the time I glanced in the bathroom mirror, with my black mask, the girl who stared back was the pure-blooded Leroy I had once met. I could play as here just tonight, haughty and perfect.

When it was time, before I walked outside of the girls's dorms, with a smile etched on my face I whispered to Marlene,

"Even though my date is Remus, you know he wants you. I mean, he snogged you and all."

"Who did you hear that from!" demanded Marlene.

"News travels fast, Marls. Most of Gryffindor and Ravenclaw know."

With my head held high, my expression cold revealing no signs of emotion, I descended the staircase to meet Remus. It was time for the ball to begin.


	21. Remembrall

Remembrall

I decided to adjust my angle slightly to get a better shot and was just about to flick my playing card into a beautiful arch when I felt something heavy and soft coming into the side of my head which completely ruined my shot. As soon as my card fell short of the hat in the middle of the room, one of Remus's clubs found its way in.

"Nooooo!" I cried as I looked over at James, outraged. I threw my remembrall at him, which he unfortunately caught. The other marauders rolled there eyes and Remus stood from the bed as Peter moved passed James's to get to the ensuite.

"Well, it was a good game while it lasted…" He sighed, giving me a disappointed look as we walked to sit on James's bed.

"What?" I cried once again, "This isn't my fault! James cheated."

"Whatever Padfoot, what did you forget James?" Remus asked, changing the subject shamelessly as if I hadn't just been betrayed terribly. The smoke in the little glass ball billowed around in varying shades of scarlet.

"I dunno," He threw the snitch like remembrall at Remus deftly, snitch flicking tosser. It remained red when he caught it and a large smile spread across my face.. I returned to their side of the room wearing the top hat, tapping my finger in my chin and giving them a puzzled look.

"It seems," I said in my detective voice, "that you are both idiots." James scowled at me and I felt the glass thunk against my head and caught it clumsily before it hit the deck.

"Ah." I looked at the other two marauders sleepily before tapping my chin again. Was there a potions essay due? Did we forget to pull Snivel's hair today? How could Remus have forgotten something?

"Oy, Wormy, stop wanking and come hold my mysterious red ball!" I yelled in the direction of the ensuite tactfully.

Remus rolled his eyes and crossed the room to search through his satchel. Retrieving his assignments list he frowned thoughtfully. James lied back on the bed and began to perform exaggerated hip swaying thrusty movements.

"So, you and Marlene, eh Lupin?" James continued his comical gyrating. Wormtail emerged from the toilet and I threw the remembrall at him. Remus cheeks pinked a little and he glanced at James before rolling his eyes and rolling his homework lists back up.

"Don't be so obscene Prongs, She isn't a snarfalupugus, there isn't quite that much contorting involved." Remus buckled up his satchel as James stilled and began to make chocking noises.

"Oh God Remus!" He cried; "Your humour! Its so dry!" Peter picked the remembrall off the floor as he had failed to catch it earlier, surprise surprise, the smoke turned pack to a vibrant red.

The rivulets of smoke began to recede back into white as,

"Did you remember?" I asked excitedly from my place between a slightly relieved MacKinnon smitten Lupin and the still wiggling James.

"Yeah, I left my wand under my bed so I could go and get it as Wormtail. I hadn't thought of that…" He scurried over to his bed.

I began to fiddle with the glass orb after I picked it up from James's lion encrusted bed spread, the smoke floated around, boasting a fanciful shade of red.

"Shouldn't you lot me getting ready for the ball, anyway?" Peter remarked casually from underneath his bed.

The smoke in the ball flashed white as James looked forlornly at his hands as if there was nothing good in the world. I hated how well I could relate as I suffered a short side along glance at Moony. I really am going to have to kill him, but atleast he made sure Sabione didn't end up with Regulus!

I frowned as I shrugged, climbing off the bed as the other boys began to scramble to pull themselves together.

Looking at myself in the mirror in the bathroom I frowned at my top hat. Sabione, every thought sent both inappropriate and marriage appropriate thrills through me but I was sort of letting them take there toll.

What ever happened to Marlene McKinnons "maybe this time we will actually shag" buddy. I used to be so much more Sirius when I was less serious about Sabione. I crossed my arms. I am not James Potter, I am Sirius Black, and I do not fall in love or buy girls nice rings that they where on their fingers.

Maybe the occasional tongue ring… Or a ring for the nipple piercing Marlene had before she decided it was uncouth and let it heal over. I bought her a ring for that but that just made me a champ, engagement rings aren't kinky which means Sabione isn't getting one. I nodded affirmatively feeling more like myself already, detestable and idiotic, reckless and inconsiderate. Yup! Bitches love a good scoundrel! Right? Wrong.


	22. Salazar

Growing up, I wanted desperately to please, to be a good girl.

- Claire Danes

Obedience is not a virtue. I wanted to please everyone but myself, and I had to lose everything to learn that lesson.

- Kathryn Wesley

(A/N: I don't know what's with me and these quotes, I just...there's no explanation, it's like asking why James and Lily are meant to be for each other~)

Well, when I said, it was time for the ball, it wasn't really.

And when I mean that, I mean, early. So what a better way to spend my extra half an hour by visiting Slytherin's common room. It had never been hard to pry the password out of Regulus. When I was in there I had plenty of things to do. Since I was acting like a pure blood for this night, well, only thing to do is to hang out with Bellatrix, Lucius, Regulus, Evan and maybe even Narcissa, or Avery and Mulciber.

I approached the wall.

"Salazar."

A small passage was revealed and I walked, head held high into the dungeon. When Bellatrix saw me, her lip curled.

"Sabione. Have you changed your decision, already? We will take a pureblood descended from an ancient family back anytime." she spoke coldly, waiting for my answer.

"It is a valuable option to be considered. I do not know for sure," I paused, "And it is likely I will return, Bella. I have other options deemed worthy of consideration as well, however, the option is appealing. I do not see what this option has to give me, which is why I am here to seek my answer. I only want the best, and if I find what is suited to my liking, I will come back. And if this half an hour doesn't meet my standards, there are always second chances." I gave a curt nod.

"A wise choice, Sabione. Beautiful as always." Lucius gave me a cold smile, the formal pure blood greeting.

"I believe so. I came here to find someone in particular."

"Who have you sought?" I found myself in the presence of Evan Rosier.

"Regulus." I whispered softly, so it almost sounded seductive.

Oh, I was good at playing a Slytherin. Very good. Evan nodded,

"I'll get him." He…well what you could call "sauntered" up the staircase in hopes of impressing. No one in Slytherin impressed me except for Regulus. Any Black in fact, never ceased to impress, "apparently".

Evan came down with Regulus.

"Regulus is awaiting you upstairs, he feels the need to see you privately."

As Evan and I walked up the staircase, seeing as we were now out of the wraths of Lucius and Bellatrix, we could talk freely. I rolled my eyes.

"What was with the formalities?" I asked him.

He chuckled.

"Best way to survive without Bellatrix and Lucius getting your claws on you." He explained.

We were out of their hearing range, so I snorted.

"Typical, typical, Bella and Lucy. Great couple, huh?"

"Actually Bellatrix's younger sister….Cissy….I think, or so I've heard from Bellatrix, has gotten smitten with him."

"Oh, really?" I asked.

"Really."

We walked in silence, and passed the remainder or steps left.

I had a proposition to make, and it was a good one.


	23. Close calls

Close calls

"Love is not a victory march"

Leaonard Cohen

(a/n: I think the quotes are charming)

After some of James's fancy wand waving the top hat I wore on my head became four stacked on top of each other. The tower teetered and fell in Peters direction issuing a squeak as he jumped out of the way. Remus transfigured four porcelain masks from plates around the room; he said they had something to do with an opera phantom; some muggle pop culture reference which was fine by me as long as it upset cousin Bella. I would have to remember to mention my ensembles mugglitude loudly and obnoxiously when she was near by. We worked on turning our dress robes black and in the end Remus had to finish it for all of us. The kid new how to augment clothes, it was kind of imperative in his scruffy line of existence. We clambered into our robes hurriedly having done these things at stupid speed. How could I forget about the ball? I suppose we forgot because none of us were really going with the girls we wanted to.

"We'll get down there before the girls then, will we?" Remus said hurriedly as we all buttoned ourselves in.

"Yup, cant miss the majestic sweeping down the stairs they work so hard for" I sighed before saying.

"Yeah," James agreed, obviously hoping to get a look at Lily's swooping later. He snorted "did you see Lenora Thomas practicing earlier?" We all shook our heads as we thought of girls and there girlinesses on our way to the door.

"I hope Lily wears green." James said wistfully, I whacked his top hat off as I clocked him on the back of the head.

"You know she will Potter! Its all she ever wears. Come on!" I jumped the last few steps into the common room.

I scanned the room for a moment, we weren't to late down but the common room was pretty crowded.

"Oy Black!" I turned to see a very well put together Marlene. Slender with rushes of curled blonde hair. Her lips painted red to match her smoky dress. She looked very good, I felt a playful grin pull at my mouth as I approached her. I am Sirius Black and Sabione can go fuck herself.

"Aye McKinnon?" I weaved across the room.

"Get that look off your face Black, I have a story for you." I lifted her deft little hand to my mouth and gave it a kiss before pulling her close.

"Go on," I whispered in my best whisper. I wasn't completely buying back into my womanising persona but Marlene made it easy, she was a good friend, she made it easy.

"Once upon a time," her voice was light and feminine, I tried not to compare it to a certain husky, dulcet tone. "There was a very handsome boy," I gave her an affectionate squeeze and she batted my arm, she moved away so we could look at each other properly, her amber mask caught the light in a muted shimmer.

"and he didn't know a good thing when he had it." She said this very seriously, I pressed my lips together but said nothing. "There was a very unusual girl who wanted to be loved by the boy, but he wasn't very familiar with love. No one had ever taught him what it was, he thought love was about winning." I frowned but said nothing. Marlene did know me well, she was probably the best voice of reason I could ask for in relation to this stuff. She wasn't going to sugar coat it and she knew what she was talking about.

"I agreed with him," She looked down and I snorted a little,

"But?" I prompted, I could feel the "but" staring daggers into the back of my head through his porcelain mask as she spoke.

"but she was wrong, they both were. One night there was a ball and the boy and I realised that they were only ruining what was good by hiding behind what they knew." I pushed her hair behind her ear and she gave my hand a squeeze.

"Lets not mess this one up, eh Black? I am going to go over to Remus now and you are going to take this," She pulled a piece of paper from who knows where and handed it to me. "and you are going to stop fighting. Don't freak out." She pulled me close and gave, me a hug.

Her familiar body moving against mine in an unfamiliar, very unMarlene gesture of unromantic reassurance.

"She is in the Slytherin common room. You have wrecked her head, go fix this." She stepped back and smiled.

"How does the story end?" I asked and she rolled her eyes behind her disguise as she moved passed me.

"it's a work in progress." I turned I saw a very angry Remus frowning down at Marlene as she talked in her usual unmoved, coy manner. I saw Moony's posture stiffen and I flinched as I saw his scarred mouth curl around the word vehemently.

"Slut." Marlene returned his snarl and with a loud resounding clap, she slapped him. A seriously good smack. People turned to stare and tears began to build in Marlene's eyes. As Moonys stupid face whipped aside from the lash of the hit and his mask skid across the floor Marlene wiped a tear from her face. Our eyes met across the room, she shook her head as I moved towards her.

"Go" she mouthed and then suddenly my view of Marlene's face was obstructed by a certain possessive kiss. Progress I thought, as Marlene tugged him into a familiar nook.

I looked down at the paper and saw "Slytherin Common pass: Salazar."

Well, that was that. I ran out the portrait hole toward the dungeons. Damned snakes, why the hell was Sabione down there?

"Any reason I particular you have taken up a habit of running around like a loon Black?" I stopped to see a black cloaked Lucius Malfoy in some poxy green mask that made his hair look more retarded than usual. "Really, does you shameless muggle loving betrayal know no bounds?" Malfoy asked in his usual polite haughty town which he used to say unforgivable things.

"How did you recognize me?" I cried and the gasped. "Were you staring at me bum Lucy? You can tell me, we are all crazy self righteous self serving hate filled thugs here aren't we? You must feel right at home, this environment is a perfectly safe place to compliment my lovely bum!"

Lucius moved forward but suddenly my feet were pulled out from under me as Bellatrix emerged with her wand trained on me.

"What Malfoy? Did the mirror tell you I was the fairest of them all so you decided to retaliate by setting Bella on me?" My heart began to pump uncomfortably fast in my chest as Bella approached, she looked more deranged every time I saw her, it didn't matter how much I hated her. She just bought into all that blood shit, sure it was an ignoramus thing to do but its still distressing to watch someone you grew up with slowly loose their mind to blood lust.

"Ooooh! Is ickle Sirius feeling a little mouthy!" She cackled quietly before I felt my body flying limply toward the wall. As I was bludgeoned against the craggy stone wall I felt the air rush out of me. Once, my head span. Twice, I couldn't breathe. Three times and I felt the warmth of blood spread through my robes. Then I was sailing toward the ground, Bella cackling madly on her silver mask. The out she came from no where, her feather edged mask was reinforced with black enamel. Her body brushing sensually against an all to familiar wrap around gown. Her Violet eyes wide, unhappy and scared, scared like I had never expected to see. Real fear.

"Sacre bleu, Sirius!" She stabbed her wand through the air and then there was an invisible net just before the ground, I inhaled a shaky breath before I was dropped the extra foot. I hit the ground with a wallop and groaned.

"Thank fuck" I coughed out and I rolled onto my back, the marble below my drew a taut comparison to my more battered half. My mouth tasted coppery and my head heavy. There was yelling and flashing light but all I could really think of was the great angle I had on Sabione. From my spot on the ground I could see right up her tunnel of dark and shimmering materiel to her creamy legs and the edge of the curve her bum, unfortunately she had put on a pair of knickers. I scowled at the materiel as she stood over me, why was she standing over me? There was a scrambling of feet and I saw Regulus pass by my field of vision. As my ears unpopped I heard Sabione tell him to keep them away from her lest she do something even more illegal. Then Regulus was running away and I closed my eyes.

"Black? Sirius, can you hear me?" I was to sleepy to move but I felt her pull me into her lap as she moved down next to me on the ground. She removed my mask brushed my hair from my face.

"I was going to have all the girls tonight." I blurted and somewhere in my brain there was a screaming to shut up but my mouth seemed quite content to walk us in to trouble. "Didn't quite work out though, ended up getting some exercise running after you as usual." I coughed again and inhaled sharply. My body felt battered.

"Your not the only one who had their plan ruined." She said in a surprisingly appeased tone. I was so confused;

"Bella must have really done a number on me for you to be acting so nice even though I'm acting the maggot." My breath rattled a little on its way in and I felt her hand coast over my heart which seemed adamant to escape my chest in search of her.

"You're a mess." She spluttered a laugh and I opened my eyes to look at her. Her tear landed on me and I tried to give her a charming smile.

"I was coming to get you." I told her, she laughed again and sniffed.

"Coming to save me?" She enquired with a bit of bite. I snorted;

" Nah, if you want to play with snakes that is your prerogative. I came down her to tell you something." my heart thrummed in my chest.

"And?" She whispered and I was happy that even though my entire body was bitching in pain My mouth didn't falter and give her a cheeky grin.

"come closer, it's a secret." I whispered.

"Oh please Black, you are half dead and your trying it on?" but she did move a little closer. Her perfume was light and fresh.

"Kiss me and I'll tell you." She gasped scandalised and I felt her beginning to move away and I flinched as my ribs ached from her jarring movements. She stilled.

"Sorry." She sighed as she pulled my closer, adjusting so that her back was to the castle wall. I braced left arm on the ground on one side of her and sat up to face her.

"Sirius! Stop, you will damage yourself!" Her eyes were wide behind her mask and I pulled it from her face. Pressing her finger to her lips I smiled a little smile. She was so beautiful.

"You're beautiful." I whispered and she took my hand from where I had it in her hair and pulled it to the ground. I held tight to it, gritting my teeth as pain rattled through me for a moment.

"Fuck." I shut my eyes tight as it subsided to its comparatively cosy deep throb. I looked into her eyes and said as clearly and as seriously (Siriusly) as I could;

"Kiss me."

"Sirius, I-"

"Please," and my voice broke embarrassingly. Was I that repulsive to her? If she would just kiss me I could know, know if I was going to be some pathetic idiot professing his unrequited love or if I had a shot.

Then it just sort of happened. One hand scraped into my hair and the other held my own. Her mouth pressed to mine, simple, soft and desperate. I pulled her hand up and held it to my heart which was beating rapidly.

I broke away and she pulled in a shaky breath, I licked her lip lightly as I moved away and she let out a light laugh.

"Tell me." She demanded and I grinned; "Sirius, tell me."

"Open your eyes," and she did, Violet. Midnight blue with purple. I felt a little dizzy.

"I-" I began but then my eyes crossed, My vision shook and my nerves felt shot;

"I-" I tried again looking at her with every ounce of my unspoken words; I closed my eyes tight and then opened them again but there was only black.

"I can't see" I choked out.

"Sabione." My voice was panicked, I hated how afraid I sounded as I continued to move my blind eyes around in their sockets.

"Sirius?" She placed her hands on the side of my face. "Sirius?" Her voice shook.

I heard foot steps approach and my arm gave before I collapsed into Sabione's lap. I fell asleep, I think.


	24. Gryffindors Can Be Slytherins

"Everybody deserves to have something good in their life. At least once."

- Morris Gleitzman, Once

"Sirius?" I cried desperately, and I felt compelled to touch his face, "Sirius?"

And nothing. He didn't say anything. His eyes were tightly closed. I let out a breath I didn't know I had been holding, the pressure from my hand he had been holding released, and was seemingly lifeless. He couldn't die, not him, Sirius Black. In all that time I had claimed to detest him, but I never had. And that day, when I started to fall for him, I still denied what people said about us. He was the best thing that had ever happened to me, the best thing in my life that had ever happened.

The tears I had been holding back for what had seemed like eternity, for my whole life, began to flow down my face. Each teardrop, one by one, landed in his hair, and gave the effect of a sparkling crystal. A sob escaped my lips, it was too early for him to die.

I loved Sirius, I loved him. I had to do what was best, what was best for him, if I truly loved him. Which meant I should stay away from him. It hurt so badly, it was like a cut that ran deep, never healed.

In my whole life, I had always been able to eventually get what I wanted. I wanted him, and I was pushing him away. It was was all for him, Sirius Black. I wanted to run away from this life of mine, this nightmare. I wanted to start again.

A soft sigh was heard from behind me. Remus and Marlene stood there, hand in hand. Everything was so easy for them.

I nodded at Remus.

"Take him..." I managed to whisper, "I'm no better than a Slytherin, Marlene. I'm not the Gryffindor you believed I ever was, Remus. There's no avoiding the truth. With no denial, I was destined for the life of a Slytherin, and there's no turning back now."

I handed the lifeless Sirius to a speechless Remus, and I turned away, headed to the Gryffindor common room.

I was going to take my things, leave not a trace of me behind, and be a Slytherin. I was a pure blood and I wasn't the girl who ran away anymore. I was the pure blood girl from the ancient family who strived for perfection.

Mudbloods and traitors, were not my friends ever, and never had been.

I had to see Regulus or Evan, now. My life as a Gryffindor ended. My life as a Slytherin began. I needed a transformation. I needed to look like a Slytherin, act like a Slytherin, hang out with Slytherins. Salazar Slytherin, welcome me into your world.


	25. Padfoot in Bed

Padfoot in Bed

I felt like I was floating above us. She was crying so much;

"Stop!" I called to her, I thought she was going to get sick on her self she was crying so hard. I wanted to shake her and kiss her and tell it was ok and that I had loved her this whole time. Then I couldn't hear her, I couldn't feel anything or receive anything. I must have been asleep but I was conscious.

If you are sleep you are unconscious, right? Oh god I was such a fool for loving her, who gets tangled up with Bellatrix Black over a girl?

Well really I didn't know or care what happened as long as somewhere beyond that nothingness, the sensationless state I found myself in; she was there. Holding me, begging me to wake up. Even if I couldn't feel her, if I couldn't hear her. I didn't want to think of her forgetting this had happened to me and going on and living her life while I was stuck in my body alone. I couldn't bare think about her forgetting all about me trying to save her in the hall way and getting slammed against a wall so hard I went blind. Forgetting that I had kissed her even when I was so dizzy I thought I could die any moment later. That's not true though, I didn't think I was going to die, I thought I was going to go sneak a peak at Poppies cleavage while she complained about the state of me and put me back together. I thought this would be something I could forget about, it would just be that time I got slammed around. What if all that I had from then on had been that nothingness, something I lived, or rather, didn't live every day. Sabione would forget, why wouldn't she? I would forget if I didn't have to live it. I knew how selfish it was but I needed her to not forget about me and how much I loved her, even though she didn't know, I liked to think, in case I never got to tell her, that she did know some how. How could she not?

That was the whole point of us, she was my story. She was the unusual girl who taught me what love really is and I guess I just didn't expect love to be something that went unsaid while I all but died in the arms of the most perfect and most beautiful girl in the entire world. I couldn't be dead. I just had to wait until I could wake up again. I had to tell her, even if I woke up and she had moved on. Like that mattered, I would win her back. She was my girl, it was all very simple really, or it would be. There was one thing holding us back more than any other. Sabione loved to run, she could run faster and harder and more permanently in a direction, more than anyone else. She was like a force meeting no resistance, if a ball starts rolling and no one stops it, it will never stop. If Sabione starts running and everyone did everything in their power to stop her, she would still never stop. But that was thing about an unstoppable force and an immovable object.

When I woke back up, I was going to love her so hard that she will have to love me back. I was going to kiss her so much that she would going to realise that there was nothing else worth doing. Yup. As soon as I woke up.

It had been a very very long time and I was so bored I thought I was going to scream. I could feel my body around me but that was about it. No sound, no sight, no taste, no touch. Nothing!

Fucking FUCK YOU BELLATRIX BLACK! She had rammed me in my body and I couldn't get out. How was I supposed to seduce Frenchie if I was stuck in here? Fuuuuuuuck I was just so bored.

I had come to pass the time by trying to remembering every single thing me and Frenchie had ever said to each other.

"You mean Frenchie and I." said Remus from his place reading a book in front of the common room fire in my head.

"Shut up Moonie, you prat." I said and he looked at me boredly;

"Do you want me to leave? I am not exactly having a ball. Your imagination is shit, all I ever do is read a book with no writing on the pages."

"Just stay." I sighed and he gave me his wan smile.

"Yeah." he turned back to his blank book.

Yup. Things had gone to far. I needed out.

I remember in second year when I had thought Frenchie was going to kiss me in the middle of the great hall but she was just leaning passed me to get a slice of brown bread. I had really thought she was going to kiss me, I had been embarrassed and excited and confused and later that night was the first time I had kissed Marlene. I had never really thought about kissing girls before that. It seemed like Sabione was going to be my last kiss if I never got out of my head. The thought wasn't so bad, I really liked the thought actually. I thought about that kiss a lot. I thought about her more than anyone else. I thought about what she had said about Regulus, about him just doing things differently and I finally got it.

Sabione and I had run away from all those pure blood fanatics, guns blazing, lotsa fire and brimstone. Regulus had never called someone a mud blood, but he had used the word, he never ran away from my parents, but he never stayed longer than he needed too. Regulus was playing the game, and suddenly I was really very very proud of him for being so strong. But I had been trapped outside of sensation for so long that it could have been weeks since I realised how proud of him I was and I still couldn't tell him. When I first realised I just wanted to run to him, I wanted to say I was really sorry and that he was braver than any Gryffindor. That I missed him.

Fuck I am so bored!

A high, grating whistling noise sounded in my ears. I fought sleep every time I felt it come for fear of not waking back up but I had obviously lost my ability to stay awake because I had just woken up.

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee', the whistle squeaked and I was shocked, the sound wasn't my imagination. I was hearing it through my ear. Well more precisely it was coming from my ear, there was a slight pop and the whistling was replaced my the slight rustle of sheets.

My hair was touching my ear. I could feel my hair and it was touching my ear, that was quite possibly the most amazing sensation in the world!

"Fuck." I heard the croak with my ear. "Oh fuck! That came out of my mouth!" I cried exuberantly.

"Oh thanks sweet mother of god!" I called out and I balled my hands into fists. I felt the sheets.

I was actually waking up. I had never thought about the difference between regaining consciousness and waking up before but oh god there is a hell of a difference.

Suddenly I was very afraid. What if I was still blind? My daren't open my eyes for fear of seeing nothing. I could only shiver whenever I thought about it. Whenever I thought of the "I love you." that became "I can't see.". I didn't want to know. I had waited so long to see what was happening. I had wanted so much to wake up and run and eat and kiss.

Not to mention that I really like people. I would rather spend a day with Snivellina than a day on my own! To heck with it! I didn't care if I never saw a pretty sunset again and not being able to see her is just a good excuse to feel Frenchie up. I tore against whatever sleep sand had been gluing my eyes shut and put my hands over them. Which in itself was actually such a relief, when I opened my eyes held my hands in front of them for a moment.

"Its not that big of a deal" I told myself, appreciating the sound of my voice (oh shut up! Yes appreciating it EVEN MORE than I usually do, haha);

"They could probably magic them better." I told myself assuredly. Just like they magiced me awake, yeah, that's rich. I moved my hands away from my eyes and let out a sigh of relief that I was in the confines of the hospital wing. Which I could see and here and touch and move through, I swung my legs over the side of the bed and noted my pyjamas. My body felt weary but it was nothing that a little pepper up wouldn't solve I'm sure. I padded heavily over to the shelves of tinctures and found the little blue dropper among the various beakers.

One drop for what ails ya and another for luck. Feeling like someone who hadn't just spent god knows how long in a bed I decided to leave the hospital wing. No way was I wasting this buzz on forming more bedsores, heck. I'll sleep when I'm dead.

My wand was on my bedside locker surrounded by cards and stuff. The marauders left one with a drawing of me lying down with exes over my eyes.

"Stop being so dramatic" Read the text on the front and when I opened it, it just said; "We knew you were faking"

I snorted, charming lot. Their was a letter from Marlene that had little hearts floating out of the top, I lifted it and the little bubbles popped releasing girly smells.

The front said "Between you and me…" and the inside said "the hearts are just to make Remus jealous ;) , I hope for your sake you can't hear me when I talk because if I find out you have been hearing what is going on and staying in bed waiting for prince charming, then you are in big trouble.

You have been in bed for: 13 days 2 hours 14 minutes and 29 seconds

please get up. You've left us in a right mess. She comes when she thinks no one will find out just so you know. Marlene."

The timer on her card clicked over for another minutes and the stopped. Their was a card from the Gryffindors that just said to get well soon and another from the quidditch team. At the end of my bed there was a thoroughly perused pile of pink stationary and I shook my head, women. Maybe it was a good opportunity to try out the sensitive guy thing that Remus had going on. Nah, apparently McKinnon is just off her nut for the measly silent type. Weird.

Almost two weeks I had been asleep. Well… "asleep". I suppose I had to go tell Leroy that I wanted to die in her arms again, just not for a looong while.

There was a creaking by the door and I (from years of snooping in the hospital wing when I should have been asleep) instinctively jumped into the bed. Either way when the door of the hospital wing opened with a quiet swoosh I was staring at the ceiling. Quiet steps and then a warm hand on mine.

"Hi." I heard her say and I smiled.

"Hi," I croaked out in my under used voice, I opened one blurry eye and saw something I wasn't expecting.

Leroy had her hair out of its usual style of lengthy curtain of black satin and had it in some sort of god-only-knows-how-complicated-I-dare-you-to-even-try-to-run-you-fingers-through-this up do, her lips were painted a ruddy colour as opposed to there usual natural berry stained state. Her eyebrows looked darker and her eyes were decorated with one of those meticulous and neat little swishes. Diamond earrings hung from her ears and for the life of me I couldn't figure out why these elegant little add ons made me so apprehensive. Where was Frenchie? I found myself asking. Where was her big soft pair of violet eyes and her regularly bitten hard set lips.

She looked so put together, my eyebrow furrowed as her eyes widened. The way she looked was so very contrived. I sat up in bed and she took a step back. A flash of what I had originally expected to see when I opened my eyes ran through her posture as her eyes became open for a moment. She took a breath and sort of checked herself before returning her weird composure. She were an overly large white dress shirt and I smiled a lazy smile when I realised it was the one I had been wearing when I had gotten the crap beaten out of my by sweet cousin Bella.

"Sirius!" She cried as I returned my eyes to hers.

"You look good in my shirt." I smiled as I swung my legs over the side of the bed.

"I look…" Her mouth fell again and I continued to smile, being all pulled together really didn't suit Frenchie, she unravelled like a false noose. Her nostrils flared as I stepped close to her;

"Two weeks?" She cried; "You spend two weeks lying at deaths door, you have the gall to make some poncy miraculous recovery and apparently I look good in your shirt! Really?" Her hands were on her hips and she started to look less like my mother at a dinner party and looked more like the sexiest girl alive. I pinched her arm.

"Ow!" She hissed.

"Oh yeah, this is definitely real." I felt something sharp stab at my stomach and I looked down to see Leroys wand burning a hole through my shirt at my abdomen. No, this is definitely Sabione, an eye brow pencil and an up do wouldn't change that over night… or a fortnight. My cheeks started to hurt from smiling but really I was just glad that I could feel my cheeks, whether they hurt of not. I looked back up at her and raised and eyebrow. Sabione is so great. I moved my hand from where it had pinched her and began rubbing it up and down her arm lightly, Christ she is soft, two weeks of deprivation from everything will really make you appreciate something as full of all the good things as Frenchie. For a moment a sort of lustiness flashed across her eyes as I continued to caress her arm but then as I looked at her mouth she literally flinched, as if I had punched her instead of pinched her.

"I don't know why I bother." She spat before swerving to leave and I patted at my smoking pyjama shirt as her dolly shoe clad feet pattered away. Oh right, she is her. That explains why she is crazy. Damn I was so rusty at being outside of my head. Damn two week long coma, what shit is that?

"Frenchie, wait!" I called after her and she turned to me and narrowed her eyes.

"You are such a child Black! You have no clue about anything outside of your own damned batting eyelashes. I am not just some French chick Sirius!" Her voice quivered around my name tentatively and my hands hung loosely at my side as I stood in the middle of the hospital wing. She had one hand on the door handle.

"I am the girl who you systematically seduce and then turn your back on. The girl who has to watch Marlene McKinnon and every other fucking girl in this school preen by the bed side of the biggest tosser I could possibly have chosen to…to…" A tear ran down her cheek and my smile finally fell.

At that moment I really didn't care if I turned blind or if I went up in flames. As long as I could just hold her first. She opened the door of the wing but I slammed it shut. Her head was bowed and her dainty hand remained on the door handle. From my place behind her I could see all the bobby pins used to keep her hair in place. They pulled and snapped at the silky strands sternly. It looked sore. Her shoulders were shaking and I wondered when she had picked up the habit of crying because of me. I wrapped my arms around her and pressed my cheek to her hair. I didn't mind that the perfumed smell on her skin was unlike her usual scent of residual chocolate and linen. She was the only Sabione, it didn't matter if everything on the outside changed and she looked different and acted different. A few choice words and she would still burn a hole through your top and go running off like always. But not this time. Two weeks of thinking had taught me a lot.

Leroy wouldn't turn into me, she continued to clutch the handle on the door for dear life while I held her.

"You left." She whispered and I felt heavy.

"I know." I said in a steady modulation.

"You said my name, like you needed my help. Like you needed me. Then you were gone." She sniffed and then struggled out of my grip as she screamed it out.

"You were gone! You fucking left!" I looked at the ground and pulled at my hair. I could hear the words that she didn't say. Hundred of thousands of imaginary conversations will do that to you. "You left me." She was saying and I knew I had and I felt a great swell of something in my chest. Like a wave breaking. I left with out saying good bye. I left without saying I love you. I left her like she was just some French chick. I woke up and I acted like she was anyone. I am such a prat. I covered my face with my hands and groaned out her name,

"Sabione!" I covered the space between us, I gripped the tops of her arms and I shook her. I looked straight into her eyes;

"How could you be out there? Out here with everything and know everything but the only thing I know for sure?" I poured it into the words. I poured the need and the desperation that had filled my hollow existence for the two weeks that had felt like an eternity to me into the question as I spoke it.

I raised one hand to push the tears from Sabiones cheeks.

"No more crying because I don't love you Sabione." I hissed and she closed her eyes as if I was barbing her with the truth. I shook my head and pulled her close enough to erase every stitch of space in between us, she, the unstoppable force and I, the immovable object.

"I will always love you." I said in the most affirming voice a man who had everything to loose could. Her brilliant violet eyes opened and her hands ran into my hair and her lip curled as she leaned into me.

"I fucking knew it!" She laughed and then she was kissing me as if that was all it would ever have take to get this kiss. My knees felt melted and my heart seemed to be racing faster than Sabione could run. Her lips were softer than any lips covered in lipstick should be but I suppose you can't dilute Sabione. I felt like her kiss was pouring bits of her right into me and I felt full enough to burst. This was not Sabione, the girl who I had failed to love, this was Sabione who had eventually beaten the thick out of me with her bare hands… and she knew it. In her kiss I could feel it, that give. That something she had held back, then, as if she had been doing it on purpose, she released more passion like a flood. I opened my mouth against hers and puffed out breaths of hot air against her lips and she took my bottom lip in between hers to pull it into her mouth. I groaned loudly and fisted my hands in my own dress shirt that she was wearing. Fuck, how did I not realise how hot that is earlier? Then I felt her biting into lip and it only sufficed to make me worse. Just like old times.

I pushed her to the wall of the wing and she hitched one leg around mine.

"Sabione." I breathed as she kindly returned my lip. She laughed again before she turned us around and pushed me to the wall. She managed to fit a great amount of feeling in between her movements and I shook a little as she grazed her finger nails over my back. I clicked my hips against hers and moved my mouth to her neck. How could you fit that amount of sheer sexual magnetism into one person? I licked lightly above her pulse point and felt the rapid pace of her blood pumping through it. I placed an open mouthed kiss against it, her skin was so stupidly, mockingly soft. I pulled her leg back toward my side and moved against her again as I blew lightly on her neck;

"Oh." The lone syllable that escaped Sabione's lips as she melted into me was something I went through great lengths to memorise. Perhaps it would be best to make sure that it's a sound I hear again… and often.

I spun her into the was once more and brushed her lips against mine slightly and then backed away.

"No fair." I smiled and opened my eyes. She looked up at me, her hair was falling from its high end style, thank god, and her lips had lost most of there painted on colour, now simply looking bee stung from, kissing. Her beautiful eyes, well, I was really glad she couldn't paint them a different colour because if even a single purple fleck was found out of place there would be hell to pay. Her eyes were perfect. She was perfect.

I looked down at her mouth and decided that it was looking a bit lonely. I moved to kiss her and our lips brushed lightly before she moved back again. I groaned and threw my head back.

"That is so not funny! Where is my sympathy, I nearly died defending your honour less then two weeks ago!" I told the ceiling and then I felt a warm breath against my throat as she let out a little laugh. It was followed by Sabione's hot little berry stained bee stung candy mouth. She left a burning trail of kisses down the side of my throat. She reached the spot that made me wobbly, as if I could be anymore like putty in her hands and began sucking lightly. I groaned appreciatively and moved against her again. How could she know? How could she have possibly known about that spot. She stopped abruptly.

"Sirius?" She whispered in a voice that was even huskier and more generally sexy than usual as if that were even possible.

"Uh-huh?" came my less then elegant reply, but hey, cut a guy some slack, have you seen Leroys arse? Well I had my hand on it. I wasn't going to launch into conversation.

"Say my name." She commanded and I felt my cheeks colour. My, how the tables have turned.

"That's not funny-" I began but then I felt her administer a little bite to that certain spot on my neck and I literally (and I have no shame in admitting this) almost fell over;

"Sabione." I hissed and she giggled. I shook my head; "Fuck," I cried out hoarsely; "Remind me to get beaten up by groups of deranged Slytherin freaks more often."

Very quickly after this statement there was a serious depletion in neck kissing and I felt Leroy's signature punch becoming reacquainted with my stomach. Every DAMNED FUCKING TIME!

"Leeeroooyyy." I whined as Sabione moved out from between me and the wall;

"Why do you have to fuck everything up?" She cried and I heard the door slam behind her.

I stared at the ground, bent with the pain of the blow to my, apparently, still healing body.

I sat on the ground clumsily and placed my head in my hands.

God, I loved her.


	26. Rosalie Fletcher: The Ravenclaw

I hated dares. And such dares like the one James Charlus Potter had given me. But, I did take bribes. Who can resist five galleons for wearing Black's shirt?

So, I got a good snog and five galleons. That's the sweet life.

After I had visited the hospital wing, faked that I loved him, cause the other day, I realized the "love" I had for him was just brotherly affection or something, I payed a visit to the lovely Slytherins. Evan, Narcissa, Regulus and I were closer than ever, these days.

I was talking to Evan in the Slytherin common room, chatting about who was better, Lily or Severus.

"You gotta know, Evan, Lily is a piece of work. Snape is already framed as Snivellus by," I paused to reword, I could not let the word Marauders slip out, "those Gryffindors, but the nickname, oh, it's stuck." I finished.

"Yes, but Sabione, but you know what Evans is, she's a-"

"Don't call Lily that, you know the punches I can throw, Rosier." I warned him.

"Geez, geez, sorry." He held his hands in the air, "Evans is a muggle-born. To put it nicely, we, the Slytherins believe pure-blooded witches and wizards are far more talented than muggles, muggle-borns and halfbloods."

I snorted.

"Annaliesa Flesh?" I pointed out.

Lisa was a muggle-born Slytherin I was friends with. She was one of the best duelers I'd ever seen.

"Exceptions, Say, exceptions." I hated the nickname Say he used on me. It sounded terrible and was terrible.

"It's getting late, Ev. Gotta go, I guess." I sighed.

"See you...whenever..." he trailed off.

That was my cue to go. Five minutes and curfew, it was going to begin. I broke into a sprint, and when finally, I spat out the password and reached the common room, I heaved myself down on one of the plushy armchairs.

"Tired, Sabione?" A weary voice asked me.

"Oh, hey Remus. I'm alright. You?" I asked him.

He say down opposite me, on a equally comfy chair.

"Quite tired, actually. I have patrols tonight." He told me, picking absentmindedly at the loose golden thead of the armchair.

"REMUS? YOU WHAT?" I screeched.

He looked relatively shocked.

"What?" he asked.

"I'm taking your shift, Remus. No objections."

"Sabione-"

"You heard me, I'll go tell...who's meant to be patrolling with you?"

"Rosalie Fletcher, Ravenclaw, our year."

I nodded and headed for the Ravenclaw tower. I used the knocker and the eagle asked me,

"What is the colour black?"

What was black? The opposite of the colour white? Suddenly, I could feel a voice in my head, a legilimens.

The answer to it is, black can be described in more than one way. It displays no colour, and doesn't reflect any light, so it appears black to us.

Regulus, I am clearly going to kill you, you get that? You scared the heck-a-ma-lot out of me, you idiot.

My pleasure, Sabione.

You are so dead.

I repeated what Regulus had told me to the eagle and the door swung open. Ravenclaws, watch out. Welcome me to your world.

Wait- was that Black snogging Rosalie Fletcher?


	27. King Knob

King Knob

After what I eventually decided was enough time spent sulking on the floor of the hospital wing I set out to find Regulus. Sabione was obviously important but right now would probably not be a good time to hunt her down, what with all the fire and brimstone.

There was only one thing I could consistently credit Sabione with however, she was unpredictable. I couldn't help but wonder if me not being around to wreck her head for the last two weeks had been what had aloud her to pull her self together into her new updo-sporting overly-articulate momentarily-refined princess mode.

How wrong I was, as I left the hospital wing and reflected on how Sabione had never actually taken the opportunity to profess her own unending love I managed to find Regulus. He was flouncing around some corridor with tapestries covered in tar to mar the materiel on them as it had been described as "candid abjurations of all that should be commended as wizarding" by some pureblood ninny, yup, sometimes I actually listen to Remus talk. Regulus stopped dead when our eyes met. His face fixed into a sneer but then relaxed as he looked me up an down. I had slipped into my fancy trousers and had my cloak over my pyjama shirt since my own dress shirt was currently wrapped around a certain Venus. I suppose I looked like I had gone haywire

"You are well then?" My younger brother asked in a tight controlled voice. I nodded dumbly and took a step towards him, he tensed.

"I am uuuh" this was not like thinking it in your head, "I was wrong." I managed to say, hoping to break the ice.

Regulus folded his arms in a gesture that mirrored my posture toward him so many times it was like a blow. How many times had he started this conversation with me only to be hexed and shunned?

"Reggie." I put my hands up in a gesture of surrender and I fixed my eyes on his. He quickly adjusted his gaze to stare over my shoulder. I took a deep breath,

"Sabione is fine Sirius, I kept an eye on her. Its been a bit rough but she is fine." he said it all in a rush as I nodded slowly and Regulus began to turn away. Things weren't going quite as I imagined. My mouth was stuck for a minute but my feet seemed to remember what they were doing as they pursued the newly named Black heir quickly and I grabbed his arm. He stiffened and a moment later I was pressed with the flat of my back against the tar covered tapestry, the acrid smell filled my nose.

"For God sake Sirius would it kill you to just leave me alone." His wand was centred on my chest and his eyes reflected his message beseechingly. "Please." I shook my head at my brave brother for a moment as my mouth worked, a tight noise found its way out of my throat and then like a breath I managed to say the right thing;

"I'm so so sorry for everything Reggie, I was wrong this whole time, I was just really wrong." he lowered his wand and I wrapped myself around him suddenly; we were hugging. Like when we were kids and we were in it together. I had never felt closer to anyone then I did to my brother in that moment and I sniffed a little; "I'm really proud of you Reg, I was just being thick, I'm sorry." my words muffled in his shoulder and we moved away from one another. Regulus looked a bit watery but her just punched my arm lightly.

"Thick doesn't even begin to describe the way you were being Sirius." and I glowed with pride once more, because not only was Regulus strong and resilient, but he had forgiven me, King knob.

"Thanks for keeping an eye on Leroy for me." I bumped him with the side of my shoulder as we began to stroll down the draftee dejected corridor into the wider, homelier part of the castle together.

"Yeah, it was all for you." He rolled his eyes and bumped me back. Things didn't feel strained.

"She may have taken a leaf out of my book mind you; Sirius." Regulus turned his lightly coloured eyes on me and shrugged. I bit the inside of my cheek;

"Which leaf did she take exactly?" I prompted confusedly;

"She has taken to killing time in the presence and style of a high class member of Slytherin house since you took your little leave of absence." I could feel Regulus assessing my reaction from the corner of his eye. I didn't want to toss things up with Regulus so quickly so in an attempt to maintain our tenuous new bridge of connection I didn't freak out outwardly;

"That explains a lot." I managed to squeak out in a semi indifferent modulation. Why? Why go back to that? Although the hair and the uproar over certain Slytherin deprecating comments made more sense under that circumstance I still couldn't get why she would go all pureblood princess now.

"She was pretty upset after that night at the ball, she kind of forced herself to move on after that. She hasn't been herself, she is kinda convinced she belongs with Slytherin and totally convinced she belongs away from you." I snorted at this

"She didn't seem to down on the whole us having a thing thing back in the wing." I could feel a lofty smile spread across my recently assaulted lips as I turned to look at Regulus proudly; he didn't look convinced;

"I guarantee you by now she has developed a very different understanding of that event; she has a real talent for pushing people away." I shook my head no and began to flail my arms as if to bat the thoughts away;

"No way Reg, there was no mistaking what happened; I mean she got kinda upset before she left but that's just how it is with us. She as good as loves me mate." my goofy grin held firm as the words spoken aloud soothed my own doubts.

"I hope so Sirius but you really shouldn't underestimate Sabione's ability to adapt, she is practically top of the second ring in Slytherin house already and she pulled that off while suffering from some sort of weird emotional trauma." Regulus seemed thoroughly distressed as he went on and a sense of panic began to grip me.

"It was great catching up with you Reggie but uuuh…" the overly mature young Slytherin turned to me and smile knowingly;

"Go smash a few walls Sirius;" his eyes glazed over and I stepped forward confused

"Regulus?" I asked cautiously and he moved his eyes back to me once more;

"It seems she is on her way to the Ravenclaw common room." He tilted his head and me and pointed to a winding stairway on the opposite balcony, a staircase in front of us began to shift and I decided to chance it.

"I'll talk to you later Reggie." I ruffled his hair and hopped on the semi shifted top step as it turned and thankfully moved in the direction of the promenade opposite. I could hear Regulus chuckle.

I barged up the stairs to the Ravenclaw common room and was met with a petite brunette girl with olive toned skin and brown eyes, I recognised her a the Ravenclaw prefect from my year. Her rounded eyes turned to me as she fiddled with the ends of her shoulder length hair; she looked taken aback;

"Weren't you staying in the hospital wing? Black, yeah?" I smiled distractedly and nodded,

"Yeah, yeah, just keeping an eye out for Leroy, you know how it is. She should be around here somewhere, do you have the pass in love?" I leaned toward her slightly and tried on a winning smile to persuade her to let me in to the common room. She would have to be a prefect though wouldn't she? She blushed a little and then smiled slowly;

"Well actually, it is a riddle Black" I blinked at her and then nodded slowly as a cool voice resonated from the wooden door in front of us;

"Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder but what of love?" the brunette didn't really seem to know what to make of it and I chuckled.

"Love is blind." I told the door and it swung open to reveal a room, not unlike the Gryffindor common room in its charm, but much more refined with velvet cushioning, book lined walls, several Romanesque statues and great swaths of dark blue fabric. I couldn't help but throw the prefect a condescending look as we entered the common room together and I plonked unceremoniously onto one of the dark velvet sofas.

The girl obviously didn't like to be brushed off as she sat herself down beside me.

"That French girl seems to be giving you more than her fair share of trouble Black." the Ravenclaw placed her hand on my knee and I frowned a little, why was everyone so preoccupied with warning me off of Sabione? "You know," Her light trill continued;

"I don't see you finding her anywhere around here anyway, isn't she down in the dungeons wrapped around your brother every chance she gets these days? I don't see what busyness she has with you since recently the only time she mentions you is to mock your naivety." My insides twisted and I felt barbed. Had I become that much of a joke? Surely she wouldn't be traipsing around by my bedside in my clothes and kissing me and smiling like I brought the sunshine with me when I told her I loved her if I was just a plaything. Was she playing me? My frown deepened and I looked down at the girls hand on my knee, shit, what was her name? I heard Remus mention her name before; Rebecca? Rachel? Rosalie? Rosie?

"Her and Regulus?" I felt a tingling sense of betrayal that I wasn't entirely unfamiliar with when it came to Regulus, I just didn't think this is what he meant when he said he had been taking care of her. I felt like an idiot. I felt like crying, but I didn't want to because if this was the way the puzzle fit together I they weren't worth the time it could take to wipe a tear away.

"Oh yeah, it was the talk to the school for a while." I looked up at the clever girl and saw a sort of pity in her eyes, this could not be happening. I thought back to the moment I had told Sabione how I felt. I blanched. She had laughed, she had laughed right in my face. "Are you ok?" I heard the soft voice of the girl ask, when I looked at her again she suddenly looked very pretty and kind and gentle and not at all like she was going to punch me in the gut or shag my brother. I nodded dejectedly and then tried to push away all the messed up shit I was feeling.

I let out a hollow laugh; I needed control, I needed to just be in control for a moment.

"You have incredible eyes love." the words came out, practiced and romantic. She blushed and I moved her hair out of the way of her eyes, they really were quite pretty. I just needed to not think about Sabione, Rosie or whatever her name was, she was blessedly unSabione.

"Thanks I guess." She kept her eyes on mine and I pulled my wand from my pocket and summoned a little ticket before handing it to the honey toned girl. She looked down at the small red rectangle and giggled predictably.

"Redeem for one kiss." She read aloud and I stretched my mouth in a rehearsed movement, letting loose a wink. She handed the little ticket back and her cheeks coloured further as I looked it over with faked faux sobriety before throwing it over my shoulder.

"That all seems in order." I moved my hand to the back of her neck and pulled her into a warm kiss. It was a comfort just to kiss a girl with my wits about me. Kissing that girl would make me loose my head, I leaned closer to the sweet brunette. This was better, safer. Distracting. I didn't want to think about her and Regulus together, but I felt like it had to be true. Climbing out of bed and winning them both over before the night was out seemed impossible, it was to good to be true and the worst part is, the whole thing stank of Sabione.

She would do anything to stop me getting near her in the past, maybe I had been deluding myself to think that things had changed. Things were never going to change. A little whimper escaped the gentle girl and I deepened the kiss carefully. I felt like a lecher; Marlene was going to kill me if she ever found out about this, this was just my stupid life ruining tendencies getting the better of me. Sabione was as good as in love with me and here I was halfway to broken hearted drowning my sorrows with my tongue halfway down the throat of some girl whose name I didn't know, where have I seen this before?

"I am the girl who you systematically seduce and then turn your back on" Sabione cried in my head and I felt my heart begin to pick up, what was I doing? I moved to pull away but next thing I knew I was hanging from my ankle in the middle of the previously slowly emptying Ravenclaw common room which was now beginning to fill back up rapidly. There was only one person who I really cared to see in the crowd though and she stood, still looking so well put together in my shirt under a Slytherin cloak, but now everything was different. She stood looking half betrayed and yet half weirdly satisfied as if she had just had a point proven. I hung limply from my foot, avoiding her eye pointedly. I was caught in between accusing her of running off with my brother and begging her to forgive me so I could fucking grow old with her or some shit.

The room became tense, Ruby or whatever her name was, sat in silence on the couch and Sabione gave me a look which held more disgust then the average look I would receive from my mother. I almost decided to gnaw through whichever major artery I could reach while I was hanging there because my chances of actually being with the one girl I was in love with were once again shot to fuck. I was done, but then surely we had made it through worse scrapes then this?

"Don't you look so smug you conniving little shrew!" Sabione rounded on the poor Ravenclaw girl and as I craned my neck around I was surprised to see that the seemingly gentle prefect did look very pleased with herself as she stood purposefully from her place on the plush chair. My head began to feel heavy with blood as a familiar dizziness came over me, oh god, if I passed out up there I better have woken up again, enough had gone wrong during my last coma.

"Oh please, this has nothing to do with you, you can't have every boy in the school Leroy!" Sabione bristled and I decided that I might aswell enjoy watching Sabione looking like a hot mess while it wasn't directed at me. I mean even through my neck felt about ready to snap from the angle I was forced to hold it at I couldn't complain about the view. Who ever said great tits aren't everything?

Maybe there would be a cat fight and shit, I mused hopefully as the girls stood toe to toe and I swayed precariously over the Ravenclaw house, maybe it wasn't the most dignified predicament but by marauder standards I commanded overwhelming respect by just keeping my jocks on. As the Rosie girl pulled her wand from her robe all I could think was 'I am in so much trouble.'


	28. Sides

]

OH, BLOODY WHAT THE BLEEP.

Merlin forbid I ever and I mean ever walk into the Ravenclaw common room again. I can feel myself shuddering uncontrollably. And boy, not only that, but I am furious. The boy who confesses his "undying love" for me eats Rosalie Fletcher's face. Mental picture not needed.

I made my way to the Gryffindor common room, yelling at Remus, something vaguely like,

"SORRY REMUS! CAN'T TAKE YOUR SHIFT! DID YOU KNOW YOUR BEST MATE IS EATING YOUR PATROLLING PARTNER'S FACE?" I mentally screamed at him.

Haha, no. Just no. Noooooo. That what I wanted to scream and shove down his throat. But absolutely nooooo. I, Sabione Leroy being an eloquent high-class pure-blooded being said,

"I'm so sorry, Remus. I have a complete phobia of something I just saw, and I really can't bear it to patrol, I'm sorry..." I apologized.

I think I take that back. Eloquence clearly my fat arse.

Real smooth, Leroy, real smooth.

Regulus's voice floated into my head.

I sighed exasperatedly.

"That's alright, Sabione, I'm sure I can manage." Remus gave me an unrealistic smile.

C'mon, Sabione, you can't hide everything with occulemency, you know I'm going to force something out of you soon.

I pulled at my hair.

"SHUT UP! ALRIGHT ALREADY! JUST SHUT UP!" I screamed, Remus looked taken aback, "BLACK SNOGGED ROSALIE FLETCHER! GET IT ALREADY?"

"Uh….Sabione? Are you alright?" he asked me cautiously.

"Just….just….I'm fine, Remus. Completely peachy." I huffed.

"Did you say something about Rosalie and Padfoot?"

"Well….yeah…they're…um…kinda busy….." Eating each other's face off, I wanted to add.

Just at that moment he strolled in.

"Sabione….I…"

"Black. Don't you ever dare say my name if you have no purpose of it! It's obvious," I repeated what I had planted in his head, "I am the girl who you systematically seduce and then turn your back on! Black, I know everything good you've said about me has been a lie. You're just covering up so the you dearest mother, my most absolute favourite, Aunt Walburga, will be pleased to hear that you've been socializing with a pure-blood instead of James Potter the blood traitor. Or Remus Lupin the half-breed werewolf. Don't forget Peter Pettigrew the unintelligible freak. Maybe even Lily Evans the mudblood." The word mudblood lingered on my tongue like a bad taste.

"Don't you dare talk about how much I am like my family or called my friend those names!"

"Oh, but you know it's true. You want to please them, Aunt Walburga and Uncle Orion,but you'll never succeed them in the way I have. They adore me. They'd always wanted a girl. A boy who does not follow their family beliefs is not wanted in this wizarding world, Black. It's either join You-Know-Who and his death eaters, Professor Dumbledore and his allies, or die. Choose before it's too late."


	29. Not Yet

Not Yet

I stared at her, I just stared. There I was, in the middle of the common room in my best suit with a pyjama shirt underneath, the night wasn't even over yet and I was more or less sure I was going to strangle the love of my life. My hands started to shake violently, itching to rip every damned pureblood to bits, pleading to tear Leroy's precious façade in two clean halves just to set one on fire and keep the other one in my heart forever. That wasn't an option though, I knew it, and she knew it for dear sweet fucking baby Jesus that this was either all or nothing or all for nothing.

"I don't give a flying fuck about you and your politics love!" I spat as slipped my hand into coat pocket to wrap around the edge of my wand. "But if you really want me to choose I will, because I chose you along time ago."

I lunged forward, her hand moved to her wand but I was ready, her wand flew across the room. Her nails dug into my hand and my wand fell on the carpet with a light thud. She grappled, I cursed, she grappled. I dragged her out of the common room, she bit my hand, I tugged open the first door I saw and retaliated by throwing her into the room ahead of me I followed her in and slammed the door shut.

She looked so stoic as she yelled and cursed, like one of them, like my mother when she would scream louder than a banshee without a particle out of place. I didn't want to be accepted by my family, I had wanted to be loved by my family but that wasn't a reality.

She reached for the door handle, I pushed her out of the way and delivered a heavy footed kick to the handle, it broke off quickly. The wandless beautiful irate girl continued to fume, we were trapped until we scaled the side of the window or broke the door. Genius. She punched me in the head and the inside of my mouth began bleeding.

I know splitting Sabione into the girl I want to love and the girl she loves to be isn't a reality. I told myself;

Not yet.

"I hate you!" she cried, and she just kept saying it

kick my shin;

"I hate you!"

Punch to the gut;

"I hate you!"

A kiss which hurt more then any of the others put together;

"I fucking hate you."

I shook my head and looked into her eyes.

"What happened to you?" I found myself asking.

"Well don't get to up it now Black because a lot more than YOU has happened to me!" and then she decked me, I lying flat on the ground before I knew it, ears ringing, cock doesn't know how to feel and my heart had taken a leave of absence having beat its way right out of my chest when she first kissed me. I groaned and rolled on to my side. She lost it, she was on the floor, bent in half. Crying harder then I thought possible for anyone, never mind her. But then again, she was nothing if not passionate.

"I didn't know anybody, I didn't have anywhere to go. We didn't all have cushy blood traitor mansions to flounce around in! For me leaving actually meant something! " I was about to say something, to try and hold her but I just, couldn't. "Forget it." she spat as she wiped her tears away hastily.

"I love you." I blurted at the same time and our eyes met.

I couldn't take it, I needed to kiss her, to feel her, to help her.

Not yet. Her eyes narrowed and her lip curled as she placed her hand on a nearby desk to pull herself from the ground. Only then did I realise we were in a sort of small box room filled with old furniture and dust.

"I would give a lot of people the time of day if they had any trace of sincerity Black, but you are just trying to play me, well its not me now and I can in no uncertain terms confirm that I am a billion times more likely to fall for someone just by virtue of them not being you," she began to kick the door. I stood and pushed her against and kissed her. She kissed back. For just a moment everything seemed like we might get married after all, unfortunately, Sabione Leroy doesn't kiss and make up, she kissed and makes worse. God I hated loving her.


	30. Benefitting Me

Trust me, when I say my world DOES NOT revolve around Sirius Black, it means my world DOES NOT revolve around Sirius Black.

No exceptions.

I have plenty of other things to do then rip Black's throat out like a cannibal. Really.

Okay, yes, I was lying, but that only just passed off as a lie. I'll admit 99.9% of my life revolves around Sirius Black. Wait, what? I did not just say that. Only 0.01% revolves around him. Yeah-

"AAAAAAH!"

And here came a high pitched scream of terror. I could hear papers being dropped, and folders being scattered. Whatever was going to happen was not good. I mean, now, while I was lying on Black's chest wasn't the best time or place to contemplate whether my world revolved around him or not.

"MISS LEROY AND MR BLACK! IT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE TO GO AROUND CONDUCTING INAPROPPRIATE BEHAVIOR IN MY OFFICE! 15 POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

McGonagall looked flustered at the sight of us. Before I could even open my mouth to speak of some preposterous unbelievable excuse, Black clapped his hand over my mouth and smirked, before saying,

"C'mon, Minnie. What's got your wand in a twist? Have you just had a lovers' spat with Slughorn? Trouble in paradise? I mean, Minnie, it's not like we went that far. Have a dirty mind, eh?"

"MR BLACK!" she screeched furiously, going a bright shade of crimson.

I don't what got into me at that moment, but anger flared through me as fast as a bullet out of a gun. I cleared my throat loudly, which caused both of them to look at me. Glaring at Black angrily, I raised my hand and slapped him across his face, causing him to yelp in shock and pain.

"BLOODY HELL! LEROY! WHAT THE BLOODY HELL WAS THAT FOR?" Black yelled at me, clutching his face as if it was about to fall off. Boy, I hoped it did.

"BLACK! LANGUAGE! MISS LEROY! IT IS NOT APPROPRIATE OF A YOUNG LADY LIKE YOU TO PHYSICALLY ATTACK ANOTHER STUDENT! FIVE POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR! I AM ASHAMED TO BE TAKING POINTS FROM MY OWN HOUSE!"

A young lady like me? Oh, I was no young lady. One glance if you actually knew me would tell you that I was not a lady that would invite you in for jam, scones and tea.

"Professor McGonagall," I began in what I hoped was a prim, rather coaxing voice, "I'm afraid you are mistaken. Black has been taking advantage of me. I did not want this to happen." I gave her a grim smile.

"WHAT?" Black yelped, still clutching his face, which on one side was tuning a rather blotchy reddish-purple.

"Mr Black, three weeks of detention. Your punishment during those sessions will be considered between Professor Dumbledore and myself. As for you, Miss Leroy, for your rash behavior, you will be cleaning the trophy room with no magic for the following two Sundays along with Black."

"W-what?" Black stammered, "I have to do detention for three weeks and clean the trophy room with her for-"

"I was referring to the other Black, your brother in Slytherin."

Black was as red as a beetroot, steam was supposedly pouring out of his ears and was wholly very unattractive.

"Anyway…" McGonagall said, "Miss Leroy, you may be excused. However, Mr Black, we are not yet finished with our discussion about this matter."

Then, I realized that Black's arms were still wrapped around my waist from before. I quickly ridded myself from his grasp before walking out the open door, the one that had recently had its handle broken off.

I do things that benefit me, and only me.

I don't do things that benefit Sirius Black, or even McGonagall for that matter.

I may have all the goods in the world for me to share, and I only share if giving away the goods benefits me somehow. I like to make life hard for people - make their life harder than it already is, even though that may be as overly horrifyingly, completely hard as hell. Yes, I know, I am completely selfish.

Don't think I don't know that.

Because trust me, I do.

I'm just trying to grow someone else a backbone. You see, I'm doing them a favor.


	31. Traitor

Traitor

I crashed into the dorm in a myriad of floaty hand throwing gestures that were not at all diva like and completely called for. I was so thoroughly enraged that I barely appreciated that it was my first time back in the dorm for… what had that letter said? Two weeks?

"Two weeks in a fucking coma because of her and her fucking need to get herself into damnable situations." I began to pull at my hair and span at the nearest object quickly watching it shatter with my wand. It was that stupid remembrall from that night. I watched the puff of smoke lift for the ceiling and growled as I turned to my next victim; a down pillow;

"Shag my brother will you?" A lamp shatters;

"Kissy kiss the toes of every damnable pureblood lout who gives you a moments notice?" A patch of wall paper starts to smoke and fall to the ground smouldering;

"Slut!" I yelled and the drawers from beneath James's wardrobe removed themselves with several clamorous bangs;

"Filthy," boom; "lying," the window cracked and shattered out of its frame; "Slytherin," the edge of Peters bed post cracked as the four poster collapsed; "WHORE!" my face was wet as I shot a spell at the door while it opened. I was met with the firm set grim mouth and amber eyes of one of my best friends;

"Protego." Remus hissed and my spell hit the carpet with a sort of thud as my snarling face fell; he rose his wand with a whip;

"Expelliarmus." he caught my wand and my arms fell slack to my sides;

"Are you quite finished making a fool of yourself Sirius?" he spat and I shook my head as I swayed and landed face down on my bed. I turned onto my back and stared down the canopy over my bed;

"Not yet." I told the curtains and heaved a sigh. "Her and Regulus?" I spat hoarsely;

"You and Fletcher?" Remus remarked coolly as I heard him set himself down with one of his heart breaking weary sighs on the trunk at the end of my bed. I snorted.

"She threw me under the bus with McGonagall and scored more down time with that" I inhaled sharply gesturing at the ceiling for a moment; "with him."

"I didn't say she was Hogwarts sweetheart either Sirius but you have to admit, what you did was petulant." I sat up to look at Remus incredulously;

"I almost died for her and she replaced me with my brother, please point out where I am at fault here?" Remus gave me a rye smile and I noticed the nix and cuts on his tired face as I turned to plod back on my back. I couldn't stare down someone as patient and damned placid as Remus. The full moon had obviously just gone by and he still came and found me. I was glad I hadn't broken his bed even as the room began to shill due to the shattered window. My chest felt tight.

"It has been a long two weeks and do I need to bring her up again? Rosalie? Judging by the state of you know I would guess you didn't act due to waning affections?" I huffed a laugh as I turned to Remus again.

"They have waned as much as your hard on for McKinnon." His nonchalant eye rolling couldn't quite distract from his coloured cheeks;

"No need to be so crass." he muttered and I smiled lasciviously while wiggling an eyebrow;

"Isn't there? With a girl like her I reckon there is." he pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled;

"So you think Regulus is getting the ride with Sabione then?" He asked matter-of-factly and I flinched slightly. He had a point, maybe I should keep referenced to McKinnon's promiscuity to a minimum… or at least when it's close to a full moon.

"Has she?" I asked with an unhappy note of desperation.

"No." Remus said and I felt like a knob; I pressed my palms into my eyes;

"Are you sure?" I asked unhappily as Remus breathed a laugh;

"Hey, don't take my word for it, I am just your friend who you haven't talked since you left the hospital wing after you spent two weeks unconscious." I felt like a prick as the door burst open;

"Are my ears burning?" I turned to see the slightly dishevelled head of James Potter emerge from the other side of the door, and I mean slightly dishevelled James standards so to be honest he looked more rough then both Remus and I despite the both of us having collective run ins with things like lycanthropy and the end of Leroy's tongue in both the best and worst possible ways.

"You are both ridiculous." I informed them as I mushed my face into my own torn pillow successfully receiving a mouthful of feathers. Then James was on top of me like an excitable James who missed me and I felt a little better. Remus sniffed in mild amused disapproval and my gut twisted, all things considered, even with James's knee in my back as he cheered like a child and Sabione sat happily where ever she was far off in the castle in the knowledge that she had bested me once again for what seemed the millionth time. Eveb with all that, it was good to be back.


	32. The Gravy of Death

**Short chapter :p hope you like it!**

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"Pass the gravy, please, Black?" I asked, avoiding his steady gaze that had been lingering on me for quite some time now.

Didn't he have better things to do than to stare at me?

"And why should I?" he asked, countering my question, with a sneer on his face.

"Is the gravy poisoned then?" I quipped, raising an eyebrow, "Because if it is, then go drink it all and die."

"I'm so wounded, Leroy." He said sarcastically, before rolling his eyes. "Kiss it better?"

"The thought of me having my lips anywhere near you disgusts me, Black. I'm officially put off my food." I sighed, looking down at my miserable looking cut up and played with food.

I pushed the plate away from me, and stood up.

"I've got homework to catch up on, Lily." I lied through my teeth, "I'll see you later."

Lily nodded, before turning to Marlene.

I walked away, running my hands through my hair.

* * *

"Tosser," I said in regards to Black who was walking behind me, "what do you want?"

"Is it a crime to walk within a two metre radius of you?" He asked, rolling his eyes.

"Well, excuse me for wanting my own space!" I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest.

"You're excused," he replied, smirking.

"Why didn't you drink the gravy and die?" I retorted.

That wiped the smirk off his face.

"Do you want me to die, Leroy?" he questioned with a distant look on his face.

"Sometimes, Black, I really do. Sometimes means now." I said, walking faster.

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**reviews would be lovely :)**

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	33. Perseverance

"Why didn't you drink the gravy and die?" she asked with a tone of exasperation and I felt my stomach twist like it often did when she hit below the belt. I wondered if she even thought about what she said. I hoped to god she didn't mean it.

"Do you want me to die, Leroy?" I asked, my feet felt heavy as she began to build up a brisk pace.

"Sometimes, Black, I really do. Sometimes means now." she walked ahead of me then, making her fine way up the hall and I pulled at my hair as I caught up to her.

"You're lying." I eventually said when I was walking beside her once more and her posture became even more rigid if possible. She shook her head and her jet black hair shivered around her, casting shadows over her pouted mouth and bedroom eyes.

"Oh Sirius I wish I was." the words caught around her French accent more than usual when she said this and I almost blushed but since I was so manly I just cleared my throat and caught her arm making her stumble and scowl but at least she looked at me.

"You cared." she opened her mouth to say something but her lips just sort of curled as I stared at her; "When I almost died that night you cared." she looked away then and I smiled; "Liar." I accused with relief. She could say what she wanted I had to believe she didn't want me dead.

"You're right Black." she eventually tugged her arm from my grip and walked on; "Sometimes I want you alive, but not anymore. Now I just want you to stay away from me before I do something I regret."

I fell into step with her as we moved closer to the tower and she ignored me, she spat the password to the fat lady and eventually rounding on me when we reached the end of the stairs to the girls dormitory. The common room was empty as nearly everyone was still at dinner. She looked at me expectantly and I realised I was just kind of half smiling at her as I stared into her hard violet eyes. Maybe I was going mad, I took a step closer to her and she flinched but didn't make any further movement to get away. I moved quickly and planted a kiss on her cheek before shifting back to look at her. Her features softened as a blush came across her cheek and her hand flew up and she slapped me across the face catching the side of my ear and making it ring slightly as my head whipped to the side and back to grin at her. I winked even as the pain across the side of my face nagged on. I wondered if I would have a bruise.

"Good night." I stated and I bit my lip as I turned toward the boys dormitory but she grabbed my arm as I turned away and I stopped still as she let go. I heard her running then as she ran up the stair case and as I turned around, I swear not just to get a look at her arse, I caught the last shimmer of her curtain of ebony hair before she diappeared around the corner;

"two, one…" I muttered and there was a bang as she slammed her door behind her. "Textbook." I muttered as I rolled my eyes, cupping my sore cheek with my hand and heading down to the kitchens to receive compensation for my half finished dinner.

Suddenly Marlene appeared out of no where and I nearly leapt out of my skin;

"Christ almighty woman can you not do that?!" I cried as my heart hammered in my chest but she just stood there looking unimpressed; what ever happened to the days when women used to find me ultimately impressive? I sighed and waited for her to complain, she didn't disappoint.

"You just won't be happy till you get yourself packed into an early grave will you? Will you?!" I bared my teeth awkwardly and she flared further; "What have you done this time?" she pressed and I shrugged frowning.

"To be honest I don't think it matters what I do anymore McKinnon. The damage is done, its like Moony says, insanity is trying the same thing over and over again expecting different results."

"Sirius, Einstein said that." Marlene said like it was the most obvious thing in the world and I nodded;

"Oh," I scratched my chin for a minute and then turned to her; "What's eye'n'sign?" I asked and she laughed;

"It's Einstein and it's not important."

"Then why did you bring it up?" she shook her head;

"Stop avoiding the issue, you and Sabione are so unreasonable!" she threw up her hands and then placed them on her hips as I folded mine in front of my chest;

"Listen Marlene I know it's not the happy ending you are looking for but just face it, Sabione doesn't _want_ to be with me, she doesn't love me, she doesn't even care if I'm alive or dead, stop trying to make this into something it's not." I turned toward the boys dormitory forgetting all about dinner but Marlene quickly moved to hug me from behind.

"Don't give up, I'll talk to her, just persevere, ok? You two deserve to be happy." I pried her hands from around my middle and turned around as I snickered.

"What on earth makes you think she would listen to you?" I asked and Marlene pulled a small piece of her hair to the front and started to braid it;

"You listened to me didn't you?" she asked before turning around and bustling toward the stairs, she stopped half way up and turned around. Taking her wand and a piece of folded parchment from her pocket she flicked the small piece of paper toward me before continuing on her way up the stairs.

"Be a doll and forward that to Remus for me would you?" and then she was gone. Like the good friend I am I immediately unfolded the paper only to find in blank due to some sort of concealment charm. Frowning I pocketed it to give to Moony when I found him.

Heading up to the dorm to stair derisively to my large stock pile of catch up work I wondered for a minute if Sabione would agree to tutor me in any of my subjects. It was worth a try of course. I smirked as I imagined her going all sexy librarian. The rest of the Marauders had bustled up stairs within the hour as I was digging through the bomb site that was James desk in search of an old essay of his I could steal materiel from.

"Alright Padfoot?" James asked as he thundered across the room to stand beside me looking a little flustered;

"If your concern is that I am going to find the love letters you have written to Evans in here and mock you unrelentingly for them then I am afraid its to late Jim." I pointed to the pile of paper at the side of the desk which looked like it contained some of James absolute best writing though it still looked like a stubborn scrawl. "I'm sure your love is legitimately as tender as a marshmallow that had been roasted to sweet gooey perfection, meanwhile where is your sixteen inch parchment on Goblin Potioneers and Hannibal the Hungry?" Remus who had been neatly folding his cloak as soon as he entered as was his habit snorted quietly at the exchange before muttering;

"Accio Hannibal essay." and holding it out to me; "Really, two thorough bred wizards and do any of you ever summon anything?" he shook his head and I took the essay from his hand and replaced it with the unfolded and thoroughly perused parchment from Marlene which I still hadn't successfully read, the moment it touched Moony's skin however words tore across the surface making him clear his throat and quickly shove it in his pocket as a rather graphic sketch began to form on the page to Remus's chagrin.

"I'd forgotten how she used to do that." I remarked as I remembered Marlene's shocking sexual repertoire. Remus remained impassive as he clocked me warningly on the back of the head wiping the lascivious thoughts from my minds eye as I scowled.

"Continue forgetting." Remus advised and I rubbed the side of my head which didn't really hurt but the principle remained.

"Why does everyone keep hitting me in the head?!" I asked and James snickered as Peter pulled of his shoe with to much enthusiasm and hit himself in the face with it;

"Because you're unbearable to love with?" James suggested and I scoffed, my belly grumbled and I threw James's Goblin essay on my bed.

"Whatever, I'm taking the cloak." I headed toward the door and pulled it off back of the chair it was draped across before James could protest, I needed a proper dinner, unlike Sabione who could apparently forgo as many meals as she wanted without passing out, although that could be one of the things that made her so cranky…

But when I arrived at the kitchens I heard a pot slam to the floor across the room, approaching under the cloak I hadn't really anticipated what I saw as Sabione stood before me smiling softly, wrapped traitorously around Regulus.

"Well this is cosy." I remarked as I whipped the cloak off and lent back against the counter smoothly. In that moment I would have been thankful for some poison, in times like these who needs a few extra years of air?

I should have quit while I was ahead. I should have never have gotten off the floor of the hospital wing that night I woke up, at least then I would have died feeling like a mattered, not like right then, when I met her violet eyes in that moment I felt like nothing.


	34. Positively Beautiful

**Positively Beautiful**

_"Beauty is not caused. It is." _

_- Emily Dickinson_

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"Well, this is cosy."

My head immediately jerked up, giving Regulus a mouthful of hair. And there was the devil reincarnated/Sirius leaning against the counter, glaring at us with such hatred that it stung. It must have shown on my face that his glaring bothered me, because then, his glare morphed into a (not sexy) smirk.

I immediately covered the blow up with a lazy smile and glanced up at Reg before locking eyes with Sirius, before drawling, "Seems like we have a gatecrasher, Reggie."

"Seems like we do, Violet," Regulus said, with equal snark.

"And what should we do about it?" I asked him, raising a questioning eyebrow indicating we should kill him, rip him into a million pieces the size of finger nail clipping and then throw him down to Tartarus.

"Your call," he said, indicating we should not kill him, tear him into pieces or throw him down into Tartarus.

I shrugged, "Ask Sirius."

He flinched at his name coming out of my lips, frowning, before running a hand through his hair.

"Spare me - I just came here to get some chocolate pudding because I abandoned half my dinner and I found you two like peas in a pod. You don't have to plan my death, you know." he forced out almost incoherently.

Immediately after Sirius said that, Regulus said, "I'd better be going now, Sabione, Lucius and Bella wanted to see me. As did Cissy. See you in detention."

"Say hello to Cissa for me!" I called at his retreating figure.

"So." I addressed Sirius, the tension between us was uncomfortable.

"Uh..." he ran his hands through his hair again, "So."

"Don't you dare try and kiss any part of my anatomy even if it means you're kissing my feet or come near me within a proximity of ten metres!" was the first thing socially awkward me blurted out.

_Great conversation starter,_ my conscience to told me sarcastically.

I blushed a little, looking down at my feet.

"Looks like I just broke the rule, then." he told me huskily, coming a step closer, then another step and another until I was looking at his upper chest.

"Mhm." was my oh-so-intelligent response.

"Has anyone ever told you that you're adorable when you blush?" he asked me, and I felt my face turn into a ripe cherry tomato.

"I am not adorable!" I exclaimed, placing an arm on his chest like a barrier between us and scrunching my nose up.

"Alright then, you're not adorable - love, you're positively beautiful." I ducked my head and stepped backwards in attempts to blend in with the pale white wall behind me which contrasted greatly with my black hair. As I opened my mouth to protest, he said, "Don't can't deny it."

And then his lips were so close - millimetres away from mine. I closed my eyes, and braced myself for the kiss I knew was coming.

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**A/N: Are you excited for the next chapter, my seemingly non-existent readers? **

**please review, it would make my day.**

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	35. Secrets

She didn't move away, she didn't sneer, she just seemed fragile. As if this was one night where she had forgotten all the tough stuff and was simply weighing under the weight of the simple little things that drag a person down. Like arguments with friends or a day in school where you panic about keeping up or a day where you can't seem to get away from that person you can't stand to see. She closed her eyes, her bedroom eyes weighing down like a surrender. Asking me not to kiss her, what a ridiculous thing to do. I could have this. I brushed a small strand of hair from her face and my hand followed around behind her ear as I closed the space between us. Her lips were impossibly soft and her hand found its way easily into my hair as she lent into me ever so slightly making me sigh. To my erratic hearts delight she smiled softly into the kiss. I began to wonder where her other hand was when I realised she was probably armed to punch me in the gut at this point as usual and thanks to my wondrously quick thinking I was able to catch her fist with my free hand. Her mouth moved away from mine as her hand went lax.

"You know I could do this forever if you would just let me." I whispered against her mouth and she hissed out a little breathy laugh before lacing her relaxed fingers with mine.

"I'm just not that kind of girl." spoke in a similarly low tone her French accent lilting lightly over her words, I kissed the corner of her mouth and her hand gripped mine a little tighter.

"Oh I think you are love, you're just a little out of practice." she shook her head, her cheeks still perfectly flushed as she dropped her gaze to the floor.

"There is so much you don't know." she muttered and then I smiled;

"Then tell me, tell me a secret, just one. I swear, I won't tell a soul." she rolled her eyes and eventually looked at me properly, maybe we should just whisper everything we said to each other, talking didn't work as well. It was to close to yelling.

"You first, something no one knows about you Sirius, something deep and dark." she raised an eyebrow and I cleared my throat. Sometimes I forget how long we'd been playing this game. It felt like my whole life.

"Well, there is something that um… that flies to mind that not even James knows. Well one person knows but, I didn't really tell her parse." I slipped my hand from hers and moved it to rest on her waist so she wouldn't feel the dampness collecting on my palms.

"Her?" she quizzed and I cleared my throat again as I lent against the counter behind me and tugged her close enough that I could avoid her gaze.

"Marlene." I confessed and I felt Sabione stiffen as she began to push herself off of me;

"McKinnon?" she asked at a regular volume which cut through our hushed revelry harshly filling the echoing kitchen. I grunted in frustration and kept her close;

"Well she was there alright, just listen, ok?" I asked and she looked up at me, brazen and hard but she nodded for me to go on, rather insistently pulling back to lean against the other counter leaving me feeling rather bared. Any charm I had managed left with her.

"Well Marlene and I, as you know, are quite close." I was already regretting the decision to bring this up but in a way I wanted Sabione to know;

"Close?" she asked sardonically and I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Alright yes, I know how it looks but despite popular belief we weren't shagging all the time or anything…" I chanced a glance up and Sabione looked unimpressed as I went on. "just once." I moved a hand to hold the back of my neck as I stared to the ground and I saw Sabione's feet fidgeting, her voice didn't waver as she spoke though;

"Is that it?" she pressed, her tone did seem a little surprised as if she thought I was off shagging Marlene all the time.

"No." I amended and I looked up at Sabione, my cheeks felt warm and I hoped they weren't physically flushed. "well that was the only time I… with anyone." I cleared my throat again, this was hard. Sabione's feet had stopped fidgeting.

"Oh." Sabione said and I shook my head;

"That's not it either, you see there's a reason nothing really happened after that." I confessed and I looked up at her again. She looked surprisingly pensive she was listening. She gestured for me to go on.

"What is it Sirius?" she stood up of the counter and I watched her elaborate violet eyes, dilated in the dim light, and tried to trust her not to react badly.

"Well I uh… I;" she put her hands on her hips;

"You…?" she raised an eyebrow and I rushed it out in a breath;

"I said your name." I blurted and I was definitely blushing as a slow satisfied smirk played over Sabione's mouth.

"Did you really?" she asked, a light playing in her eyes as I groaned and nodded covering my eyes with my hand. "Wow." she muttered and then I could feel the heat of her body just a hands width away. When I peaked through my hand all I saw was a rather sad smile.

"Sirius I'll tell you something but if you tell anyone I will murder you I swear, and don't you dare pity me either." I nodded rather gravely and she pressed her mouth in to a rather tight line.

"I must be mad," she remarked and I shrugged;

"A bit." I allowed and then tilted my head to prompt her to continue.

"Well ok." she pulled at a strand of her hair, "Well I ran away from home," she stated with an air of not quite being finished and I bit the inside of my cheek as her unnerved gaze flitted to me. I almost wanted to tell her not to tell me if it made her upset but damn, I wanted to know, to have a little bit of her.

"and since then I haven't really had a place to go and more or less all of my summer is spent…" her lip shook as she looked at me; "Fuck there really is no tidy way to say this. I beg Sirius and most nights it's not enough for a hostel so I guess, I spend eighty percent of my nights out of school out on the um… on the street." I felt my heart pull in my chest and thought of Remus saying she had a hard time of it and I wondered if her knew and all that came out of my mouth as I reached out with out really thinking and pulled her into a protective hug was;

"Oh," and then as she softened against me with a hefty breath and slipped her hands out around my back I uttered a thoroughly compromised; " wow."

Because even as I thought about it all I could really manage to come up with was how it made a lot of sense. Knowing really was like having a little part of her, a part that in this moment only really needed to be held.


	36. Stop It

**Stop It**

"Just stop it, will you, Leroy, stop it!" Marlene yelled at me, her eyes flashing with fury and anger, "After all I've done for you? Look, you've been one of my closest friends here, and now you're trying to backstab me?"

"What?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest, "What do you mean?"

"Oh, and you're doing it effortlessly. You don't know what you're doing?! Well, I'll tell you. You're ruining my life! You're ruining Sirius' life! Would you stop trying to make a move on the guy I fancy! You're making my life a living hell as well as Sirius'! _Stop fucking trying to make a move on Remus_!" She burst out angrily.

"I'm not! I swear I haven't talked to him since two days ago! He doesn't fancy me, he fancies you!" I yelled back in her face.

"No, he doesn't, Sabione," she whispered brokenly, sinking to the wooden floor, which was a huge change of emotion, "he told me he fancies you."

"Well, I don't fancy him in the slightest, Marlene." I told her.

"Really?" she asked, as if this meant everything to her.

"Really."


	37. Timing

I whistled a merry tune as I made my way up to the Gryffindor castle after eventually getting something to eat and having a conversation with Sabione that didn't result in partial nudity or moderate violence I was feeling in a better mood then I had in weeks. I stopped near a suit of armour to grin around the grand marble floored hall for a moment. The suit of armour creaked as it turned to me;

"Looking dapper as always Siegfried." I informed the suit which turned again to face forward as I laughed and continued to strut up the hall. Throwing in some goofy twirls while I was at it;

Suddenly there was a croaky sort of breath emanating from around the corner which I swear I would recognise anywhere; Filch, I shuddered;

"I know you're there, students out of bed this time of night, I'll have you by your ankles I will." I gazed down at my shapely ankle, no, I didn't much fancy being strung up by it;

"Right." I mumbled aloud and I took off in a flat out sprint toward the tower, my feet pelting off the ground as quietly as I could make them as I heard Filches uncannily speedy shuffling bearing down on me. Edging around a corner a hand sprouted out from behind a tapestry and pulled me in to a dark nook. A body that was definitely a girls was pressed to mine and this realisation was quickly followed by a silk pair of lips humming against mine. She smelt like an unusual perfume though and still panting from the run I pulled back a small amount.

"Sabione?" I asked and the girl scoffed;

"James!" she admonished indignantly and I realised that I recognised the voice as I let my hands slip from her feminine waist;

"Evans?" I asked disbelievingly with laughter in my voice, had her and James been… her wand lit up the space as she sparkling emerald eyes came into view.

"Black!" she practically growled and then she blushed; "get that damn supercilious smirk of you face before I break it off." she warned him and Sirius tried to keep from guffawing as he almost gave away there position;

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather kiss it off? Or are you saving your mouth for a certain arrogant specky prat?" he asked quoting one of Lily's less imaginative insults for James. Sirius relaxed against the wall rather enjoying himself as he raised an eyebrow and Lily put her face into her hands;

"No one was supposed to know." she mumbled as she sank down the wall; "and now you know you damn gossip queen EVERYONE is going to know." she moaned hopelessly and Sirius felt a little bad until the tapestry beside them shifted and he felt his heart stutter till James appeared and muttered;

"Moaning already Evans?" in a way that would have been rather heart breaking if he wasn't a complete twat and I couldn't hold in a snort of laughter as he turned to me with his mouth flapping about like a fish.

"Oh don't mind me James I was just getting her warmed up for you." I explained and I received a sharp kick in the shin from Lily and a rather prompt stinging hex from James that only just missed my nipple.

"Oi calm down mate." I groused as I rubbed my chest and pushed past him into the thankfully deserted hall; "An honest mistake." I added before winking at Evans and blowing a kiss to James before running away as fast as my little legs could carry me. Those psychopaths deserved each other.

As I eventually reached the Fat Lady and panted out the pass word I was still wondering whether I should reveal the little scandal I had just uncovered or if I should do James a favour, maybe blackmail him with it, seemed a fair compromise.

I walked into the empty common room to see Marlene and Sabione speaking rapidly to one another in hushed voices;

"Well if it isn't my two most favourite ladies in the whole world!" I exclaimed.

"Not now Sirius." Sabione's lovely French modulation filled up the room and I was about to retort when a shaky breathy noise came from McKinnon's direction and I floundered;

"Marlene? Are you…" I could barely say the sentence but as strange as the word seemed it eventually made its way out of my mouth; "crying?" Sabione made a cut throat gesture as I said this but Marlene nodded, her navy blue mascara mapped down the sides of her cheeks where she had pushed it and the red that usually stained her lips so tidily was worn away so that it only coloured the cracked edges of her mouth.

"No." she said in a perfectly regular voice, and I'd only seen her cry once, two tears that day that I lost it to her and more or less broke her heart. Nothing like this. She stood up and pushed the mascara further toward her hair line as she sniffled and a miserable attempt at one of her cheeky smirks graced her quivering mouth; "I'm fine." Sabione looked at me and shook her head as Marlene said this and suddenly I realised what it was;

"Remus." my friends name fell from my mouth before I could think to stop it but Marlene just nodded clumsily and vaulted across the room to fall into my bewildered arms. I pulled her to me as she lay her head on my shoulder and shook with sobs, I ran my hand up and down her back trying to comfort her as Sabione stood and crossed the room, shrugging and shaking her head as if she didn't know what to say or as if she didn't feel it was ok for her to say it.

"He doesn't love me." Marlene sobbed into my shoulder and I shushed her, girl tears, Jesus what was I supposed to do? Sabione stood beside us and rubbed her hand over Marlene's arm biting her lip;

"I'm sorry." Sabione eventually said and Marlene clutched onto me a little tighter as she stilled a little and whispered;

"I know you can't help it, and it isn't your fault but still; thanks for saying that Sabione." and Sabione nodded letting her hand drop away from Marlene's side as she looked at me with tired eyes;

"I really am sorry." she repeated, speaking more to me, and my brow furrowed, her focus turned from me as she looked behind me at the stairway to the dorms and I turned with Marlene to face it just in time to see Remus walk down the stares looking a shadow of himself;

"Well isn't this cosy." he remarked, and I wondered how I had managed to spend so much of one night wrapped everyone else's girlfriend.

**A/N: Thanks for reading and please review because reviews make me feel INCREDIBLY COOL!**


	38. Logic Isn't In My Vocabulary

**Logic Isn't In My Vocabulary**

_"Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere."_

_—Albert Einstein_

* * *

"Well, isn't this cosy." I heard a voice say, and I turned around instantly.

It was so similar to what Sirius had said to Regulus and I around a few hours ago, that I blurted out, "Seems like we have a gatecrasher here, Sirius."

I could see a spark of recognition in Sirius' eyes as he gave me a small smile and said, "Seems like we do, Violet."

I couldn't help but let a grin take over my previously morbid expression.

"What's so funny?" Marlene snapped, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Nothing," Sirius and I both responded in unison, as we both turned to face her.

"Tell me!" she insisted, almost as if she had forgotten that we were mid-crisis.

"Inside joke," Sirius explained, slinging an arm around my shoulder, which I had an urge to shrug off, but didn't.

"Since when were you two so cozy?" said Remus, rather bitterly.

I quickly span on my heel and snapped, "Since when were you so problematic?"

He flinched at that, and I took this opportunity to plan my next move. This was much like a game of chess, a game of strategy, logic and tactics.

I contemplated a few ideas, but my conscience had favourism for one idea, the idea I dreaded doing most...

Kissing Sirius without punching him in the gut.

I mean, kissing Sirius with punching him in the gut is alright of course, because a) he's not a half-bad snog, and b) after I hit him I get to see him stagger back and feel pain (very sardonic, I know). So, in other words, I get a decent snog and see him in pain...which really is a great form of entertainment...I'll stop going on about why I like seeing Sirius in pain, now, and get back to my plan.

If Remus knows I don't like him, then why on earth would he try to make a move on me? Honestly, who even—

And then, suddenly, a 'why didn't I think of that sooner' idea popped into my head to be combined with the idea of kissing Sirius. You know how everyone says 'go with the flow'? Well, I went with the flow.

"Sirius," I said, causing everyone to look up from their shoes which must've been very interesting, because they'd been looking at their shoes for a very long time, "I'm really cold."

Sirius looked at me as if to say 'now isn't the time' and 'how could you be cold' because the flames in the fireplace were burning bright, but then he walked closer to me and wrapped his arms around my waist, and asked, "Better?"

"Yeah," I nodded, and I wasn't lying, because honestly, I was sort of, kind of, really cold before he did this warm hugging thing to me.

"Spare _me _from all this lovey-dovey stuff, would you?" Remus rolled his eyes at us, and I noticed how he said, _me_, and not _us_, like he usually would.

And then I put my plan into action — I turned around in his grasp and kissed him. Just before I closed my eyes, I could see a livid expression from Remus, a wide-eyed one from Marlene, and someone climbing through the portrait hole.

"Dear Morgana!" a voice that sounded much like Lily's exclaimed.

Crap. That wasn't supposed to happen...

* * *

I sat down on Sirius' bed and he gave me a not loving or caring look, but in a disapproving one, before looking away.

"Sabione...you shouldn't have done that." he said, avoiding eye contact with me. "Remus...he won't talk to you, or me anymore. Or Marlene. The only people he'll talk to are Pron— James, I mean, who is more interested in Lily's hair than Remus' love life, Lily who won't talk to him for us, because she'll be sulking in denial about liking James, and Wor— Peter, who is hopeless at convincing him to come through."

I bit my lip and looked at the ground before sighing.

"I'm sorry."

* * *

**So I want to thank Liza (Forever Siriusly Sirius) for taking the time to give a really long and gorgeous review to this fic, which I pretty much love more than almost any other. This is dedicated to you, Liza :) also, please, please, please check out Karla's fic called** _The Castle,_ **it is an amazing fic, which I promise you will not regret reading. Thank you!**

**—Bree**


	39. Pathetique

"**I have always preferred tits to commitment."**

**Sirius Black, age 11**

Sabione sat, scowling on my bed with only a tinge of remorse to her guarded posture, I had to hand it to her, she had made her point. I was doing a less austere job of keeping my lack of remorse at our kiss guarded, it was a good thing I was too blindingly confused to think. Moony and Leroy? It brought on so many forgotten and ridiculous emotions. Things I hadn't concerned myself with ever since catching Remus having it off with Marlene some while ago, the jealousy, the frustration and worst of all a creeping sense of an inadequacy at once again having to compete with Remus. It was usually a feeling I only got when I stood next to Regulus and noticed he was most likely going to end up taller than me if I didn't take a stretch soon, my own baby brother, I grimaced. That was the thing about Regulus, he was so slippery you never know what he's going to pull out of the bad but worse yet he was so smooth and refined, something I had never really been able to pull of, all I had to rely on was my offbeat charm which without being ragingly handsome had been known to lose out to a touch of class. Fortunately I had a feeling Sabione wasn't looking for a touch of class, it was something we both wanted to escape, in all honesty I found in nauseating, not to mention she was a city vagrant but that was one thing Remus had on both the Black brothers.

Even if Leroy didn't know about his condition he certainly gave off a diamond in the rough sort of vibe that was dangerously kindred to the girl chewing her lip and staring at the wall with narrowed eyes.

"He can't want me," she announced firmly; "not when he has McKinnon, damn bird's a knock out." and her accent played up slightly in her distress making me smile a little sadly because I knew just how easy it was to fall in love with her even if you knew she was a lost cause.

"This is the last thing Marlene needs." a grumbled in concern and Sabione tilted her head questioningly, I gulped dryly, she was on my bed, we were on my bed together; "Well first I was in bed with her and I say… you know-"

"My name." she finished with dawning dread and I nod;

"and now Remus pulls this after over a month of McKinnon being more loved up than I have ever seen her, she must feel like-"

"like bollocks." she finishes with a slight lamentation and I nod helplessly;

"yeah, essentially." I agree pressing my head in to my hands;

"Remus too." and I rolled my eyes;

"It would take more than a little failed romance to phase Moo- Remus." I groused and Sabione pursed her lips;

"Just because you find it so readily in your nature to dismiss love Black it doesn't mean every other boy's the same." I gaped at her;

"Me? Me dismiss love? Oh please Leroy if anyone has sent us reeling backward since the beginning it's been you. How obvious do I have to make it that I want more with you?" and Sabione folded her arms;

"Oh for fuck sake Black, try not to pander so obviously to my naiveté for I can assure you that the use of those tired old lines is lost on me. Now, aside from your obsession with yourself you are actually not half bad at this analytical stuff so try and focus on the issue at hand." and I smiled bitterly, every compliment she paid had to enter through a knife wound;

"How could he not want you Sabione, you're such a delight?" and she sneered and hopped up off the bed;

"Go fuck yourself Black." but just as she turned to storm out as usual there was a thunk which I felt in my stomach, the sound of a book hitting the floor having dislodged itself from its position shoved haphazardly beneath my pillow, oh Sabione would have to find that wouldn't she.

"What…?" she began but then seeing my panicked expression one of pure evil flashed across her face and we both dived urgently for the book, I had it in my hand first but she quickly moved back across my legs and pulled my arms in the crook of her elbow, prizing the book free and then laughing in victory. For a moment I forgot why I had cared about not letting her see the red book as she sat delicately in my lap, holding my hand to keep it still which it was anyway and reading the name of the slim hard back book aloud. The laughter in her voice gave way to light surprise;

"Romantic French Phrases Volume 1?" she opened the book and flicked through the pages quickly; "Trying to learn French are you, lover boy?" she asked a little sardonically and I blushed to my unending shame, having her sat on my lap causing me to clear my throat an inordinate amount before I could respond in a respectable tone;

"Well there is this girl I like quite a lot and I was just, it was just on this list of things had planned to, I don't know, impress her?" I shrugged loosely feeling the beginnings of a silly grin pull at my mouth;

"Is that so?" but she didn't really phrase it like a question as she flicked quickly through the book again stopping on a page I really wish I hadn't marked;

"Tu es pathetique, Sirius." (_You are pathetic_) she mumbled as she scanned the page and trying to remember how to string together a phrase I cleared my throat again;

"je suis désolé mais…" (_I am sorry but_…) I trailed off, not sure what to say but Sabione folded the book closed and turned to me, violet eyes luminous as she smirked at me, pouting a little childishly, mocking me;

"Mais?" (_But_?) she prompted and I laughed a little nervously before shrugging and squeezing her hand still in mine.

"Mais je ne veux pas la fin de nous." (_But I just can't stop loving you_.) her eyes softened noticeably as she shook her head;

"You don't pronounce the s's in nous and pas the same as mais." and she ran her free hand through her long satin black hair;

"Damn;" I grumbled; "You don't pronounce half the letters in French."

"That's because we understand some things are better left unsaid and spelling things out can ruin the uhm…" she giggled as she waved the book before throwing to the end of the bed; "romance. Try again." she sort of whispered the last part and I moved close to her ear as I said it again, her hair fragrant, smelling of neither fruit or flower but something else, beautiful whatever it was;

"Je ne veux pas la fin de nous." I whispered and she nodded and then opened her mouth as if to say something but then she simply turned slightly and closed the space between us, our mouths touching in the lightest kiss before she broke away;

"Pathetique." she repeated as she stood up and turned again to leave, I fell back on my bed to stare at the canopy, mind oddly fogged;

"Wait, Fre- Leroy," I called after her successfully suppressing a certain nick name that was likely to have gotten me killed by the fiery creature;

"Oui?"

"What if Remus was insecure?" I asked my mind working oddly well considering how shaky my knees felt;

"Yeah?"

"About Marlene and me or something, maybe he wanted to level the playing field."

"What?" Sabione asked in confusion and I tried to think past my cock for a moment longer;

"To make her jealous, I mean McKinnon does have a reputation, maybe you should ask her what she was saying to Remus when he said that stuff about you. Remus can be kind of possessive sometimes; you know?" and I eventually sat up to look at her; the sight of her sinful mouth sending my brain far from logic, I knew exactly what I would be doing when she left,

"Come to think of it Black, you're right, he probably would have torn your head off the moment we kissed if he really loved me the way Marlene seems to think he does." and then she stopped on the spot for a moment;

"What?" I asked, although rather anxious for her to go since she was more likely to punch me in the cock then help me out if I asked her for a favour; "What evil scheme are you cooking up?" I pressed as I recognised the mischievous look on her face which snapped to annoyance as I interrupted her;

"Go have your fucking wank Black, your hard on is depressing." she hissed as she went to execute what ever plan she had formed.

"If you insist." I muttered to myself just as Peter and James burst in and I sighed;

"Oi Padfoot, any clue where the map is?" James asked and I groaned;

"Can't you see I'm in the middle of preparing for a shower?" I pulled my towel from the bedpost and hustled toward the bathroom just as Peter squeaked triumphantly;

"I knew that was Sabione thundering out of here! You owe me a pack of sugar quills!" the shortest marauder cried.

**A/N: Thankyou so much to Liza, Soniaham and Nacho5 for your support, I hope you enjoy our story.**

**I really loved your last chapter Bree,**

**Thankyou to everyone for reading and please review!**


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